Corrupt-a-wish

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Seremite
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Seremite » Sat Aug 02, 2008 4:41 am UTC

Granted, but your apartment burns down and you're forced to move miles away.

I wish I had a castle.
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The Moo Prophet
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby The Moo Prophet » Sat Aug 02, 2008 4:57 am UTC

Granted, you now have to deal with oppressing serfs and valiant knights constantly besieging you.

I wish I didn't get migraines from going a day without caffeine.

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Ansain
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Ansain » Sat Aug 02, 2008 5:07 am UTC

granted, you are addicted to nicotine instead.

I wish I never had to go so long without reliable internet again.
Why put off till today what you could just as easily get done tomorrow?

I can mathematically prove that 1 equals 0!.

Parts a-x in my plan weren't that important anyways.

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abrenecki
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby abrenecki » Sat Aug 02, 2008 5:50 am UTC

Granted. You are swallowed by a pineapple.

I wish for this wish to be corrupted in an amusing way.

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quintopia
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby quintopia » Sat Aug 02, 2008 5:56 am UTC

Granted, but the corruption only amuses its author.

I wish someone else would take over the job of informing L.A. Fitness that their high-pressure sales tactics have failed and never had a chance of succeeding.

cowsofdoom23
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby cowsofdoom23 » Sat Aug 02, 2008 6:43 am UTC

Granted, but through a shady back alley deal L.A. Fitness now sells steroids to grade school athletes.

I wish I required less sleep.

Seremite
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Seremite » Sat Aug 02, 2008 7:00 am UTC

Granted. you only need 4 hours a day, but you have narcolepsy.

I wish my head didn't hurt all the time.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby cowsofdoom23 » Sat Aug 02, 2008 7:08 am UTC

Granted, your head explodes.

Why is musical theater entertaing

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abrenecki
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby abrenecki » Sat Aug 02, 2008 8:13 am UTC

Granted. A low-flying entertaing hits you in the head and kills you.

I wish I had unlimited Internet, without affecting my usage patterns.

cowsofdoom23
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby cowsofdoom23 » Sat Aug 02, 2008 8:21 am UTC

Granted, but you go to use the restroom and a virus bypasses all your security and uninstalls your operating system.

I wish I had a giant chocolate fountain in my room.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Megatriorchis » Sat Aug 02, 2008 8:24 am UTC

Granted. It gets clogged, and your whole house/apartment gets flooded. Sadly, the chocolate was tempered, so it dries and hardens. You don't escape.

I wish for fresh-picked Georgia peaches.
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abrenecki
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby abrenecki » Sat Aug 02, 2008 8:26 am UTC

Granted. However, a real-life ninja kills you when you least expect it.

I wish for my previous wish, with the following additions:
- No viruses are created after this date. (I am protected from Mac OS X viruses - yes, both of them)
- Channel 10's Neighbours and 7's Home And Away no longer exist.

Edit: Ninja'd.
Last edited by abrenecki on Sat Aug 02, 2008 8:37 am UTC, edited 1 time in total.

cowsofdoom23
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby cowsofdoom23 » Sat Aug 02, 2008 8:37 am UTC

Granted, but you gain midas' golden touch. You to swat a fly on your head, it turns to solid gold. Your spine, no longer able to take the weight of your head, snaps and your head rips off. You slump forward on your computer and it turns to solid gold. It breaks whatever its on and falls to the floor. It hits the floor, on an anvil, and it cracks in half.

I wish I was more computer literate, so I could have come up with an answer that did not involve mythology.

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abrenecki
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby abrenecki » Sat Aug 02, 2008 8:40 am UTC

Granted. You spend all your time writing in Assembly, and become a social outcast. You die of frustration when you see that someone did the same thing your lovingly-crafted app does in 10 lines of Python.

cowsofdoom23
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby cowsofdoom23 » Sat Aug 02, 2008 8:47 am UTC

Granted, and since you did not put a wish to corrupt all of your dreams are destroyed. Enjoy being an empty shell of a person.

I wish I could code.

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quintopia
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby quintopia » Sat Aug 02, 2008 9:50 am UTC

Tenagrq, ohg lbh fgvyy pna'g cebtenz!

V jvfu V pbhyq unir pungf jvgu snzbhf crbcyr.

It's rot13.

cowsofdoom23
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby cowsofdoom23 » Sat Aug 02, 2008 9:52 am UTC

Granted, *silent crying on the end of a wireless connection*

I wish it was daylight.

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Grooving Tony
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Grooving Tony » Sat Aug 02, 2008 7:15 pm UTC

Granted it is now day time for you and only you for the rest of time


I wish for sunshine, lollipops and everything that is wonderful when we're togeather.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby cowsofdoom23 » Sat Aug 02, 2008 8:23 pm UTC

Granted, but it is really Candy Mountain Massacre, the lollipops are currently munching on your brain, and everyone runs in terror.

I wish I lived in the Nightmare Before Christmas.

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quintopia
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby quintopia » Sun Aug 03, 2008 3:46 am UTC

Granted, but you're doomed to repeat the events of the movie until the last copy is destroyed or lost forever.

I wish cowsofdoom23 hadn't said something so stupid.
Last edited by quintopia on Sun Aug 03, 2008 4:36 am UTC, edited 1 time in total.

cowsofdoom23
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby cowsofdoom23 » Sun Aug 03, 2008 3:49 am UTC

Granted, but he comes at you with a knife because you called his post stupid.

I wish that I knew everyone i was friends with on facebook.

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quintopia
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby quintopia » Sun Aug 03, 2008 4:38 am UTC

Granted, but your knife attack fails miserably, and the reason you know them is because you are now mayor of facebook city.

I wish I had another 6 pack of Dogfish Head 60 Minute IPA.

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dragongrrl
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby dragongrrl » Sun Aug 03, 2008 9:50 am UTC

Granted. But because there's so much, YOU turn into a Dogfish. A real one. You spend the rest of your life chasing catfish. Who chase micefish. Etc, etc.

I wish that my stupid Maths assignment would do itself without being absolutely crap.
Teacher: "Right, you are no longer allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of your actions."

Damn. There goes my education.

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Melannen
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Melannen » Sun Aug 03, 2008 9:56 am UTC

Granted... except you accidentally knock it into the paper-shredder 3 seconds before handing it in..

I wish I could get some sleep!

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dragongrrl
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby dragongrrl » Sun Aug 03, 2008 9:59 am UTC

Granted. You get a few hour's worth of sleep. But that's all the sleep you get for the rest of your life... which is actually fairly short, because you go mad and kill yourself from lack of sleep.

I wish I could un-shred my completed maths assignment!
Teacher: "Right, you are no longer allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of your actions."

Damn. There goes my education.

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Melannen
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Melannen » Sun Aug 03, 2008 10:02 am UTC

Granted... you meticulously piece it back together with glue, spit, and random doo-dads.... but realize that you've handed it into your english teacher instead of your math teacher! :lol: :lol: :lol:

I wish I had a nice not broken car.

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dragongrrl
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby dragongrrl » Sun Aug 03, 2008 10:04 am UTC

Granted. But you crash it the first time you drive it.

I wish I could un-hear what I just heard my dad say!
Teacher: "Right, you are no longer allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of your actions."

Damn. There goes my education.

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Melannen
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Melannen » Sun Aug 03, 2008 10:06 am UTC

Not granted... just so you can suffer lol

I wish I could get away with mameing someone that I am thinking about right now

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dragongrrl
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby dragongrrl » Sun Aug 03, 2008 10:09 am UTC

Granted. However, all their friends come and maim you right back. And THEY get away with it too.

I wish I could have a big, delicious piece of chocolate right now... //drools
Teacher: "Right, you are no longer allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of your actions."

Damn. There goes my education.

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Melannen
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Melannen » Sun Aug 03, 2008 10:20 am UTC

Granted! But you have to share... and I get the bigger portion!

I wish I could think of a better wish lol

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quintopia
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby quintopia » Sun Aug 03, 2008 5:12 pm UTC

Granted, but it's so good it's like God's number in Pi. It just can't be contained in a person's head. You go stark crazy and we go unenlightened as to its sheer brilliance. To our good fortune.

I wish for an ellipsis to end this sentence. . .

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Ansain
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Ansain » Sun Aug 03, 2008 5:57 pm UTC

... or the next sentence, or my life.

granted, a giant ellipsis falls from the sky crushing you.

I wish for an car that gets 1*10^43543363547657654454325436676787654554765 miles/gallon
Why put off till today what you could just as easily get done tomorrow?

I can mathematically prove that 1 equals 0!.

Parts a-x in my plan weren't that important anyways.

Seremite
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Seremite » Sun Aug 03, 2008 9:17 pm UTC

Granted, but I accidentally mixed some of the words around.
1*10^43543363547657654454325436676787654554765 gallons for every mile.

I wish I didn't have sand in my nose. It's largely not comfortable.
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Ansain
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Ansain » Sun Aug 03, 2008 11:12 pm UTC

granted, you instead have fire ants in your nose.

I wish my car got better gas mileage.
Why put off till today what you could just as easily get done tomorrow?

I can mathematically prove that 1 equals 0!.

Parts a-x in my plan weren't that important anyways.

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pkuky
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby pkuky » Sun Aug 03, 2008 11:22 pm UTC

granted. everyone's cars do, and there's so much traffic it takes longer to take a car then to walk.

I wish I was dr. horrible.
It rains on the enemy too!

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sugarhyped
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby sugarhyped » Mon Aug 04, 2008 2:10 am UTC

Granted. The love of your life dies and you are blamed for it. You are dead inside... But sometimes you burst into awesome song so it evens out.

I wish my life was an awesome musical.
I wanted a signature. I don't know what to put here yet.

Seremite
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Seremite » Mon Aug 04, 2008 2:52 am UTC

Granted, but it's on par with High School Musical

I wish i lived in Alaska
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Megatriorchis
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Megatriorchis » Mon Aug 04, 2008 2:58 am UTC

Granted. There's nothing but frozen tundra, lumberjacks, and oil. You get bored easily and want to go back home in less than a month.

I wish I were at Lollapalooza right now. :(
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cowsofdoom23
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby cowsofdoom23 » Mon Aug 04, 2008 6:56 am UTC

Granted, but by mistake you are sent to a weird flavors lollipop convention (STAY AWAY FROM THE BLOOD WORM FLAVOR)

I wish Halloween wasn't so child friendly now.

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dragongrrl
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby dragongrrl » Mon Aug 04, 2008 8:10 am UTC

Granted. Now you have to contend with fighting through pedophiles and tainted candy once every year. Eventually, thanks to YOU, it's declared an illegal holiday, and millions of kids come to kill you for taking away their free candy.

I wish my dinner was ready right now, and it was UNpoisoned, UNtainted, UNburned and generally tasty. For me. :D
Teacher: "Right, you are no longer allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of your actions."

Damn. There goes my education.


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