In other news... (humorous news items)

Seen something interesting in the news or on the intertubes? Discuss it here.

Moderators: Zamfir, Hawknc, Moderators General, Prelates

User avatar
Thesh
Made to Fuck Dinosaurs
Posts: 6598
Joined: Tue Jan 12, 2010 1:55 am UTC
Location: Colorado

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Thesh » Wed Nov 28, 2018 1:05 am UTC

LaserGuy wrote:Scientists determine the average time to poop out a swallowed Lego is 1.7 days. They determined this by ingesting the Legos themselves...

Shoo in for this year's Ignoble awards.


I don't think it should count if the only reason you are doing the experiment is to win an Ignoble. Kind of like the Guinness Book of Records where people were trying to fit the most stuff in their mouth or whatnot and injuring themselves so they stopped accepting submissions.
Summum ius, summa iniuria.

KittenKaboodle
Posts: 162
Joined: Thu Dec 16, 2010 6:36 am UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby KittenKaboodle » Wed Nov 28, 2018 5:36 am UTC

Thesh wrote:
LaserGuy wrote:Scientists determine the average time to poop out a swallowed Lego is 1.7 days. They determined this by ingesting the Legos themselves...

Shoo in for this year's Ignoble awards.


I don't think it should count if the only reason you are doing the experiment is to win an Ignoble. Kind of like the Guinness Book of Records where people were trying to fit the most stuff in their mouth or whatnot and injuring themselves so they stopped accepting submissions.


I think they have a plausible case for claiming it was not *just* for winning an Ignoble
the link wrote:Aim

Children frequently ingest coins (generally with minimal reported side effects); however, the ingestion of other items has been subject to less academic study. Parental concern regarding ingestion applies across a range of materials.

User avatar
Thesh
Made to Fuck Dinosaurs
Posts: 6598
Joined: Tue Jan 12, 2010 1:55 am UTC
Location: Colorado

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Thesh » Wed Nov 28, 2018 6:57 am UTC

Why not do a call for case studies, surveys of parents, etc? It just seems to me that there are better ways to find out how long objects take to pass than having adults ingest plastic, when children around the world are already ingesting objects on a regular basis.
Summum ius, summa iniuria.

User avatar
Angua
Don't call her Delphine.
Posts: 5943
Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2008 12:42 pm UTC
Location: UK/[St. Kitts and] Nevis Occasionally, I migrate to the US for a bit

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Angua » Wed Nov 28, 2018 7:49 am UTC

They didn't do it for the Ignoble, they did it for the Christmas BMJ.
Crabtree's bludgeon: “no set of mutually inconsistent observations can exist for which some human intellect cannot conceive a coherent explanation, however complicated”
GNU Terry Pratchett

User avatar
Sableagle
Ormurinn's Alt
Posts: 2153
Joined: Sat Jun 13, 2015 4:26 pm UTC
Location: The wrong side of the mirror
Contact:

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Sableagle » Wed Nov 28, 2018 10:20 am UTC

Thesh wrote:Why not do a call for case studies, surveys of parents, etc?
Parents don't start a stopwatch at the moment the child swallows the coin or lego brick.
Zohar wrote:You don't know what you're talking about. Please spare me your quote sniping and general obliviousness.

CorruptUser wrote:Just admit that you were wrong ... and your entire life, cyberspace and meatspace both, would be orders of magnitude more enjoyable for you and others around you.

idonno
Posts: 326
Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2015 3:34 am UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby idonno » Wed Nov 28, 2018 2:47 pm UTC

Sableagle wrote:
Thesh wrote:Why not do a call for case studies, surveys of parents, etc?
Parents don't start a stopwatch at the moment the child swallows the coin or lego brick.

And paying them to do so would create ethical issues and would almost certainly still not get you very good data.

WriteBrainedJR
Posts: 160
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 3:08 pm UTC
Location: Right Behind You
Contact:

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby WriteBrainedJR » Wed Nov 28, 2018 3:49 pm UTC

Thesh wrote:Apparently scientists want to add another supra-kingdom to the tree of life.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/technology/hemi ... -1.4715823

This is why no one takes scientists seriously; their taxonomy has been proven wrong time and again, and they just keep going like it's no big deal.

A new supra-kingdom for five friggin' species? That seems really inefficient.

Can we just exterminate them so we don't have to bother with them anymore? :lol:

User avatar
Angua
Don't call her Delphine.
Posts: 5943
Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2008 12:42 pm UTC
Location: UK/[St. Kitts and] Nevis Occasionally, I migrate to the US for a bit

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Angua » Wed Nov 28, 2018 5:57 pm UTC

Thesh wrote:Why not do a call for case studies, surveys of parents, etc? It just seems to me that there are better ways to find out how long objects take to pass than having adults ingest plastic, when children around the world are already ingesting objects on a regular basis.

Again, Christmas BMJ.
Crabtree's bludgeon: “no set of mutually inconsistent observations can exist for which some human intellect cannot conceive a coherent explanation, however complicated”
GNU Terry Pratchett

User avatar
sardia
Posts: 6814
Joined: Sat Apr 03, 2010 3:39 am UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby sardia » Wed Nov 28, 2018 6:04 pm UTC

Self reports are notoriously unreliable. Double blind swallowing of Legos is the best bet.

WriteBrainedJR
Posts: 160
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 3:08 pm UTC
Location: Right Behind You
Contact:

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby WriteBrainedJR » Wed Nov 28, 2018 6:37 pm UTC

sardia wrote:Self reports are notoriously unreliable. Double blind swallowing of Legos is the best bet.

So an experimental group that swallows Legos, and a control group that swallows a placebo.

What's the placebo for a Lego? Mega-Bloks?

User avatar
sardia
Posts: 6814
Joined: Sat Apr 03, 2010 3:39 am UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby sardia » Wed Nov 28, 2018 6:39 pm UTC

WriteBrainedJR wrote:So an experimental group that swallows Legos, and a control group that swallows a placebo.

What's the placebo for a Lego? Mega-Bloks?

Maybe a Sugar cube pressed into shape of Legos. Coated with pill shell material so it doesn't taste sweet. Not sure if this needs a placebo actually. How about some rainbow licorice so you can detect when your stool changes color.

WriteBrainedJR
Posts: 160
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 3:08 pm UTC
Location: Right Behind You
Contact:

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby WriteBrainedJR » Wed Nov 28, 2018 6:42 pm UTC

sardia wrote:
WriteBrainedJR wrote:So an experimental group that swallows Legos, and a control group that swallows a placebo.

What's the placebo for a Lego? Mega-Bloks?

Maybe a Sugar cube pressed into shape of Legos. Coated with pill shell material so it doesn't taste sweet. Not sure if this needs a placebo actually.

Well, you do if you want to run a double-blind study.

idonno
Posts: 326
Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2015 3:34 am UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby idonno » Wed Nov 28, 2018 6:56 pm UTC

Couldn't you set up a valid double blind study where everyone takes something like Rohypnol so they can't remember if they ingested a Lego or not?

User avatar
Zamfir
I built a novelty castle, the irony was lost on some.
Posts: 7605
Joined: Wed Aug 27, 2008 2:43 pm UTC
Location: Nederland

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Zamfir » Wed Nov 28, 2018 7:08 pm UTC

It's simple to do. Everyone eats the Lego brick. Then the control group gets the antidote, while the test group gets a placebo.

User avatar
orthogon
Posts: 3103
Joined: Thu May 17, 2012 7:52 am UTC
Location: The Airy 1830 ellipsoid

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby orthogon » Wed Nov 28, 2018 7:22 pm UTC

Sableagle wrote:
Thesh wrote:Why not do a call for case studies, surveys of parents, etc?
Parents don't start a stopwatch at the moment the child swallows the coin or lego brick.

No, but soon every Lego [block] will have its own IPv6 address, so it can time its own transit through the digestive tract and upload it to the cloud.
xtifr wrote:... and orthogon merely sounds undecided.

User avatar
Sableagle
Ormurinn's Alt
Posts: 2153
Joined: Sat Jun 13, 2015 4:26 pm UTC
Location: The wrong side of the mirror
Contact:

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Sableagle » Wed Nov 28, 2018 7:36 pm UTC

If it was owned by Facebook, every box would also come with smallprint saying that by assembling things out of the pieces you give them the copyright and patent on whatever you build, and have to pay a fee to make another of the same thing.
Zohar wrote:You don't know what you're talking about. Please spare me your quote sniping and general obliviousness.

CorruptUser wrote:Just admit that you were wrong ... and your entire life, cyberspace and meatspace both, would be orders of magnitude more enjoyable for you and others around you.

User avatar
CorruptUser
Posts: 10550
Joined: Fri Nov 06, 2009 10:12 pm UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby CorruptUser » Wed Nov 28, 2018 10:51 pm UTC

Do Lego figurines pass through quicker? I'm now imagining a groups of Lego people having a series of adventures such as "Escape from the colon of terror".


Also, very important. Would these Lego figures like to ride the Pirates of the Pancreas?

WriteBrainedJR
Posts: 160
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 3:08 pm UTC
Location: Right Behind You
Contact:

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby WriteBrainedJR » Thu Nov 29, 2018 12:09 am UTC

idonno wrote:Couldn't you set up a valid double blind study where everyone takes something like Rohypnol so they can't remember if they ingested a Lego or not?

Maybe? But the drug would have to be 100% effective, and to make it double-blind, you'd also have to give it to the people who give the Legos to the test subjects in the experimental group. The drug might also be a confounding variable. What effect does it have on the digestive system? It's possible that it could make the time slower or faster than for a non-drugged individual.

Plus...give people a date-rape drug to time how fast small pieces of plastic move through the digestive tract? I think the saying for that is "the cure is worse than the disease." Or maybe just a plain "first, do no harm."

CorruptUser wrote:Do Lego figurines pass through quicker? I'm now imagining a groups of Lego people having a series of adventures such as "Escape from the colon of terror".


Also, very important. Would these Lego figures like to ride the Pirates of the Pancreas?

That depends. How whitewashed would the pirates be?

User avatar
Coyne
Posts: 1111
Joined: Fri Dec 18, 2009 12:07 am UTC
Location: Orlando, Florida
Contact:

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Coyne » Thu Nov 29, 2018 4:30 am UTC

Thesh wrote:I don't think it should count if the only reason you are doing the experiment is to win an Ignoble. Kind of like the Guinness Book of Records where people were trying to fit the most stuff in their mouth or whatnot and injuring themselves so they stopped accepting submissions.

Nah, come on: could anything be more ignoble than cheating to get an ignoble? There might be a rule, but in the absence of a rule, this should be a way to win.

WriteBrainedJR wrote:A new supra-kingdom for five friggin' species? That seems really inefficient.

Can we just exterminate them so we don't have to bother with them anymore? :lol:


Isaac Asimov wrote:"Two is an impossible number, and can't exist"


Where there be five, there will be more...
In all fairness...

User avatar
ucim
Posts: 6895
Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2012 3:23 pm UTC
Location: The One True Thread

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby ucim » Thu Nov 29, 2018 5:16 am UTC

Coyne wrote:Where there be five, there will be more...
Five is right out!

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

User avatar
Angua
Don't call her Delphine.
Posts: 5943
Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2008 12:42 pm UTC
Location: UK/[St. Kitts and] Nevis Occasionally, I migrate to the US for a bit

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Angua » Thu Nov 29, 2018 7:24 am UTC

Surely the easiest way to make it double blind is to just encase the figuring in something digestable. Then give a fully digestable pill as the placebo.
Crabtree's bludgeon: “no set of mutually inconsistent observations can exist for which some human intellect cannot conceive a coherent explanation, however complicated”
GNU Terry Pratchett

User avatar
Zamfir
I built a novelty castle, the irony was lost on some.
Posts: 7605
Joined: Wed Aug 27, 2008 2:43 pm UTC
Location: Nederland

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Zamfir » Thu Nov 29, 2018 11:33 am UTC

Or we make all Lego bricks from something digestible, thus solving the root cause of the problem.

User avatar
Soupspoon
You have done something you shouldn't. Or are about to.
Posts: 4060
Joined: Thu Jan 28, 2016 7:00 pm UTC
Location: 53-1

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Soupspoon » Thu Nov 29, 2018 1:49 pm UTC

https://shop.lego.com/en-US/Vestas-Wind-Turbine-10268
Includes a new-for-January-2019 spruce tree; manufactured from sustainably sourced plant-based plastic.


(Though, handling said tree, it doesn't seem to have been made with obviously digestible plastic. So it probably isn't, just plant-sourced monomers.)

User avatar
Coyne
Posts: 1111
Joined: Fri Dec 18, 2009 12:07 am UTC
Location: Orlando, Florida
Contact:

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Coyne » Fri Nov 30, 2018 6:42 am UTC

The little Lego house is way too close (YouTube) to the Lego windmill.
In all fairness...

User avatar
sardia
Posts: 6814
Joined: Sat Apr 03, 2010 3:39 am UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby sardia » Sat Dec 01, 2018 10:47 pm UTC

https://www.npr.org/2018/11/30/67240195 ... -d-c-clerk
White guy thinks New Mexico isn't part of the US, and refuses to issue marriage license without foreign passport. The couple complained to the guy's boss, and he too didn't recognize NM as a US state. 20 minutes later, and I presume googling states in America, the situation is finally resolved.

I would have made a bet with that moron, and the guy's boss. At least get some restitution for the wasted time. What's next, denying foreign looking people rights cuz they look brown?
Last edited by sardia on Sun Dec 02, 2018 4:21 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.

jewish_scientist
Posts: 1042
Joined: Fri Feb 07, 2014 3:15 pm UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby jewish_scientist » Sun Dec 02, 2018 9:27 am UTC

LaserGuy wrote:Scientists determine the average time to poop out a swallowed Lego is 1.7 days. They determined this by ingesting the Legos themselves...

Shoo in for this year's Ignoble awards.

Everything is awesome: Don't forget the Legos wrote:Pre‐ingestion bowel habit was standardised by the Stool Hardness and Transit (SHAT) score... The primary outcome was the Found and Retrieved Time (FART) score.

I literally loled. Also, the authors formatted Lego wrong. I do not know the right way, but considering how complicated the whole issue is I feel like this is a pretty same accusation to make.
"You are not running off with Cow-Skull Man Dracula Skeletor!"
-Socrates

WriteBrainedJR
Posts: 160
Joined: Tue Apr 16, 2013 3:08 pm UTC
Location: Right Behind You
Contact:

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby WriteBrainedJR » Sun Dec 02, 2018 11:47 am UTC

sardia wrote:https://www.npr.org/2018/11/30/672401957/new-mexico-id-temporarily-rejected-as-foreign-by-d-c-clerk
White guy thinks New Mexico isn't part of the US, and refuses to issue marriage license without foreign passport. There couple complained to the guy's boss, and he too didn't recognize NM as a US state. 20 minutes later, and I presume googling states in America, the situation is finally resolved.

I would have made a bet with that moron, and the guy's boss. At least get some restitution for the wasted time. What's next, denying foreign looking people rights cuz they look brown?

This is not a new problem. My parents used to live in NM, and one time they tried to order tickets for the Olympics and the person who answered the phone insisted that they had to hang up and call the number for foreigners.

This was quite a long time ago, too.

ijuin
Posts: 1151
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 6:02 pm UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby ijuin » Sun Dec 02, 2018 5:02 pm UTC

I’ve also heard idiots who insist that Hawaii is counted as “overseas” because there is ocean between it and the mainland.

idonno
Posts: 326
Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2015 3:34 am UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby idonno » Mon Dec 03, 2018 10:49 pm UTC

I think it depends on what you are classifying Hawaii for. For travel requirements and shipping costs, I could certainly see classifying it as overseas.

User avatar
Thesh
Made to Fuck Dinosaurs
Posts: 6598
Joined: Tue Jan 12, 2010 1:55 am UTC
Location: Colorado

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Thesh » Mon Dec 03, 2018 11:15 pm UTC

No, because overseas goes through customs, Hawaii doesn't.
Summum ius, summa iniuria.

idonno
Posts: 326
Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2015 3:34 am UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby idonno » Tue Dec 04, 2018 4:15 am UTC

Going through customs is more of a time cost. I'm talking about various cost options. A trip to Mexico which involves a border crossing can be done at a a low cost per person if you take a van full of people. A trip to Hawaii requires transit over water which doesn't really have near the cheap trade off of time vs price that a trip on the same land mass can achieve. How you should classify something pretty much always depends on why you care about the distinction you are trying to make. If you are just engaging in common conversation, it is clearly not right to consider Hawaii overseas though.


idonno
Posts: 326
Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2015 3:34 am UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby idonno » Tue Dec 11, 2018 3:59 pm UTC

It is too bad they are retired because I was looking forward to seeing them get sent to a different school where the missing money was less likely to be reported.

commodorejohn
Posts: 1200
Joined: Thu Dec 10, 2009 6:21 pm UTC
Location: Placerville, CA
Contact:

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby commodorejohn » Tue Dec 11, 2018 4:21 pm UTC

There's a comedic heist film/road comedy just crying out to be made in that synopsis.
"'Legacy code' often differs from its suggested alternative by actually working and scaling."
- Bjarne Stroustrup
www.commodorejohn.com - in case you were wondering, which you probably weren't.

jewish_scientist
Posts: 1042
Joined: Fri Feb 07, 2014 3:15 pm UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby jewish_scientist » Wed Dec 12, 2018 4:02 pm UTC

idonno wrote:It is too bad they are retired because I was looking forward to seeing them get sent to a different school where the missing money was less likely to be reported.

On Monday, St James' Catholic Church said the nuns had expressed "deep remorse" over their actions, adding that while the police had been informed, no criminal charges would be brought against the pair.

I would say that's pretty close.
"You are not running off with Cow-Skull Man Dracula Skeletor!"
-Socrates

User avatar
ElWanderer
Posts: 293
Joined: Mon Dec 12, 2011 5:05 pm UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby ElWanderer » Wed Dec 12, 2018 5:20 pm UTC


Obligatory Father Ted quote: "that money was just resting in my account!"

Maybe they could be sent off to some quiet covent on a quiet, craggy island somewhere out of the way, possibly with an alcoholic old nun who is scared of monks and a servant who insists on serving coffee at regular intervals.
Now I am become Geoff, the destroyer of worlds

User avatar
freezeblade
Posts: 1406
Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 5:11 pm UTC
Location: Oakland

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby freezeblade » Wed Dec 12, 2018 7:01 pm UTC

ElWanderer wrote:

Obligatory Father Ted quote: "that money was just resting in my account!"

Maybe they could be sent off to some quiet covent on a quiet, craggy island somewhere out of the way, possibly with an alcoholic old nun who is scared of monks and a servant who insists on serving coffee at regular intervals.


I, for one, would watch this spin-off happily.
Belial wrote:I am not even in the same country code as "the mood for this shit."

idonno
Posts: 326
Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2015 3:34 am UTC

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby idonno » Wed Dec 12, 2018 9:53 pm UTC

jewish_scientist wrote:
idonno wrote:It is too bad they are retired because I was looking forward to seeing them get sent to a different school where the missing money was less likely to be reported.

On Monday, St James' Catholic Church said the nuns had expressed "deep remorse" over their actions, adding that while the police had been informed, no criminal charges would be brought against the pair.

I would say that's pretty close.


It is close to not reporting someone and moving them where they could do no harm which while bad is not what was done in many molestation cases.

I strongly suspect that with money on the line the cover up would involve putting them in a role where they don't interact with the money instead of giving them access to revenue streams that were easier to embezzle from without being caught.

User avatar
Soupspoon
You have done something you shouldn't. Or are about to.
Posts: 4060
Joined: Thu Jan 28, 2016 7:00 pm UTC
Location: 53-1

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby Soupspoon » Tue Dec 18, 2018 5:37 pm UTC


User avatar
SDK
Posts: 703
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 7:40 pm UTC
Location: Canada

Re: In other news... (humorous news items)

Postby SDK » Tue Dec 18, 2018 8:18 pm UTC

Soupspoon wrote:NASA roboticists, eh. They all seem to have creative itches to scratch.

That is pretty hilarious. If you've ever had an Amazon package stolen, watch that video and prepare for some schadenfreude.
The biggest number (63 quintillion googols in debt)


Return to “News & Articles”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: plytho and 13 guests