0335: "Mattress"

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Blipo
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0335: "Mattress"

Postby Blipo » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:00 am UTC

Image
Alt-text: The TempurPedic wineglass guy broke his ankle.
Link: http://www.xkcd.com/335/

I'd buy one of these.

Gyvulys624
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Gyvulys624 » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:02 am UTC

How do you post that so fast o.O

I love the idea though. Also: send me all the extra memory foam cut outs, I'll make a castle out of memory cell bricks.

Blipo
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Blipo » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:04 am UTC

Gyvulys624 wrote:How do you post that so fast o.O

I love the idea though. Also: send me all the extra memory foam cut outs, I'll make a castle out of memory cell bricks.


Templating.

They're not bricks, though, they're.. ovally. What would you call that shape? Anyways, they wouldn't stack properly; there'd be too many little gaps. Then the enemy could fire their foam arrows through them at you.

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Ren
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Ren » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:06 am UTC

Classy. I like it.
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Gyvulys624
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Gyvulys624 » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:08 am UTC

Blipo wrote:
Gyvulys624 wrote:How do you post that so fast o.O

I love the idea though. Also: send me all the extra memory foam cut outs, I'll make a castle out of memory cell bricks.


Templating.

They're not bricks, though, they're.. ovally. What would you call that shape? Anyways, they wouldn't stack properly; there'd be too many little gaps. Then the enemy could fire their foam arrows through them at you.


I'd cut them further, into bricks... o.O

And do expand on this phenomenon called "Templating"

Blipo
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Blipo » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:16 am UTC

Gyvulys624 wrote:
Blipo wrote:
Gyvulys624 wrote:How do you post that so fast o.O

I love the idea though. Also: send me all the extra memory foam cut outs, I'll make a castle out of memory cell bricks.


Templating.

They're not bricks, though, they're.. ovally. What would you call that shape? Anyways, they wouldn't stack properly; there'd be too many little gaps. Then the enemy could fire their foam arrows through them at you.


I'd cut them further, into bricks... o.O

And do expand on this phenomenon called "Templating"


But those would be tiny bricks, and you'd have tons of leftover material. What would you do with it?

Not telling.

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Truble_Bruble
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Truble_Bruble » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:16 am UTC

Holy intimate mattress Batman!
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1337geek
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby 1337geek » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:17 am UTC

If this isn't already patented, I hope Randall applies.
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Blipo
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Blipo » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:17 am UTC

Truble_Bruble wrote:Holy intimate mattress Batman!


I don't see Robin as the kind of kid who would ever at any point need one of these.

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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby photosinensis » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:19 am UTC

Put me down for a pre-order.
While I clicked my fav'rite bookmark, suddenly there came a warning,
And my heart was filled with mournng, mourning for my dear amour.
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fryman
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby fryman » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:20 am UTC

Safari crashed halfway through loading the image, but a cache clear fixed it... weird. Definately safari's fault.
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deja
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby deja » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:20 am UTC

Gyvulys624 wrote:
Blipo wrote:
Gyvulys624 wrote:send me all the extra memory foam cut outs, I'll make a castle out of memory cell bricks.

They're not bricks, though, they're.. ovally. What would you call that shape? Anyways, they wouldn't stack properly; there'd be too many little gaps. Then the enemy could fire their foam arrows through them at you.

I'd cut them further, into bricks... o.O


Well, from the side, they would be perfect rectangles. Just stack them so that the ovally-ness is viewed from the top, there won't be any holes in the wall from the side.
Vu?

Blipo
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Blipo » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:27 am UTC

deja wrote:
Gyvulys624 wrote:
Blipo wrote:
Gyvulys624 wrote:send me all the extra memory foam cut outs, I'll make a castle out of memory cell bricks.

They're not bricks, though, they're.. ovally. What would you call that shape? Anyways, they wouldn't stack properly; there'd be too many little gaps. Then the enemy could fire their foam arrows through them at you.

I'd cut them further, into bricks... o.O


Well, from the side, they would be perfect rectangles. Just stack them so that the ovally-ness is viewed from the top, there won't be any holes in the wall from the side.


But then you'd have weak areas between every brick, and no matter how thick (<-- took four tries to spell that right) you made it, there'd still be severe weakness.

scrambldmeggs
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby scrambldmeggs » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:30 am UTC

This mattress would also be really handy for dealing with Awkward Arm Placement when one is being the big spoon. A true breakthrough in cuddling!

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tesseract
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby tesseract » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:31 am UTC

The alt text totally saved this one.
Image

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quintopia
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby quintopia » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:33 am UTC

This one totally amused me. BEST EVAR.

(In real life, only an indention of a few inches is required, not a hole, and I would totally buy one.)

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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Geekthras » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:33 am UTC

Hahaha this is a great one. Was laughing at last panel, loved alt text.

Templating:
You hit the new thread button and make a thread called "" Discussion, with [img][/.img] tags and a [url=xkcd.com/whatever]xkcd.com/whatever[/.url] and an "Alt text:" in the post and keep refreshing.
Wait. With a SPOON?!

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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby PhantomReality » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:37 am UTC

lawl! This is great I've had this problem so many times...but if you have bad breathe this can present an unavoidable situation.
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Lyra Ngalia
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Lyra Ngalia » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:51 am UTC

Comics like this is why I'd contemplate having Randall's baby.
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby mrorange » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:58 am UTC

randall, for the last time, GET OUT MAH HEAD. for so long i have been like "ack, where does this arm go, i wish there was a hole in the mattress/couch/floor here" put me down for one pre-order. its amazing how this man seems to operate on the subconcious frequency of all of intelegent humanity.
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DeadCatX2
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby DeadCatX2 » Mon Oct 29, 2007 4:58 am UTC

Cue "get out of my head xkcd!" in 3...2...1...

I was just bitching about how hard it is to cuddle up to someone while laying down because an arm inevitably gets in the way.

EDIT: Whoa, someone else posted about getting out of their head, too...at the same time. Perhaps my countdown was more on than I thought?

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sunami
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby sunami » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:05 am UTC

This girl and I once figured out how to cuddle face to face and sleep like that, without anyone's arm falling asleep overnight and us both being comfortable. Yes, ONCE. Arg.. I remember it involved one person's arm going under the other's neck, but somehow the rest just never worked out again.

This breakthrough would solve the problem in a more awesome way of course though!
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby jacqueline » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:07 am UTC

Too, too brilliant. I want one too. Also, I'd like to place an order on someone to use it with, is that on the same order form?

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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby marshlight » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:08 am UTC

sunami wrote:This girl and I once figured out how to cuddle face to face and sleep like that, without anyone's arm falling asleep overnight and us both being comfortable. Yes, ONCE. Arg.. I remember it involved one person's arm going under the other's neck, but somehow the rest just never worked out again.

Randall should patent this mattress, and you should patent THAT. Get back to researching! You'd be rich afterwards! :D
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby quintopia » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:10 am UTC

sunami: the key is doubling the girl's pillow stack size. e.g. by adding a sqüsh pillow on top of her regular pillow. This opens up a nice wide slot under her neck for an arm.

Nomenclaturist
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Nomenclaturist » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:11 am UTC

This one made me lol quite loudly, the rock'em sock'em robots caught me by surprise. Nicely done.

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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Steve the Pocket » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:13 am UTC

The use of Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots was simply inspired. Now couples who go to bed angry can work out their frustrations and make up at the same time! Somebody call a relationship therapist; this might be the next big breakthrough!
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Baalthazaq
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Baalthazaq » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:17 am UTC

1) On the idea:
This is awesome, and he should genuinely patent it before I do.

2) On application:
You don't need to cut, you just need a divot.

3) On castles of oval bricks:
The shape isn't a problem at all. You stack them on their flat sides, You tilt them ~25 degrees, each layer stacks with a 50% shift (like you do with ordinary bricks) and voila.
Alternatively: Make the wall thicker with another back layer of "pillars" in the weak spots.

Something like this:
Image

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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby space_raptor » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:26 am UTC

Well, I think it's a pretty good idea, but my left arm thinks Randall is a fucking genius.

Especially because that's the collarbone I broke, so it aches a bit if it's in an awkward place.

Rock em Sock em Robots was killer, too.
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Eleyras
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Eleyras » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:35 am UTC

See, what happened with me and my ex was the "flipper phenomenon", where one or both people have to sortof squish their arm under and to their side, leaving just the hand with free motion and usually no access to anywhere interesting on the other's body. This was your "flipper."

Alternately, things fall asleep.

Anyways, this comic made me laugh ridiculously hard, especially once the Rock em Sock em robots appeared. Priceless.
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sunami
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby sunami » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:37 am UTC

quintopia wrote:sunami: the key is doubling the girl's pillow stack size. e.g. by adding a sqüsh pillow on top of her regular pillow. This opens up a nice wide slot under her neck for an arm.

The issue wasn't the arm under the neck, that worked out great. It was then where the other person put their arm that didn't go over the first person.
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Solt
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Solt » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:38 am UTC

If you have a foam mattress there's no reason you can't make this mod yourself. It would require some experimentation and guesswork to facilitate the best arm placement, but that should be straightforward enough.

Aren't foam mattresses really expensive though? Would the placement of the hole change for a different sized partner? Because that would be a bad combination right there.
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby aleflamedyud » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:46 am UTC

Romantic *and* funny! I knew he could do it.
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Keroppi » Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:50 am UTC

I especially like the tag line.

Sometimes in mattress commercials they would also use bowling balls/pins instead of wineglasses, so... at least it wasn't the worst case.

Blipo
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Blipo » Mon Oct 29, 2007 6:06 am UTC

Baalthazaq wrote:3) On castles of oval bricks:
The shape isn't a problem at all. You stack them on their flat sides, You tilt them ~25 degrees, each layer stacks with a 50% shift (like you do with ordinary bricks) and voila.
Alternatively: Make the wall thicker with another back layer of "pillars" in the weak spots.

Something like this:
Image


But they still won't tile. So there will be gaps in your walls. So there will be weak spots. Shifting each layer would help, but not eliminate the problem.

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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Number3Pencils » Mon Oct 29, 2007 6:30 am UTC

I needed something like this before going to bed. Xkcd continues to be of the finest quality. Now I wonder if something like this will work for those of us who sleep on our sides, and always have one arm under our pillows, and the arm often falls asleep. I wish I could get to sleep while lying on my back.
Image
Spoiler:
Image

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Southwest
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Southwest » Mon Oct 29, 2007 6:40 am UTC

Haha! This one was absolutely grand. Loved it.

I could use one myself, both for cuddling, and, since I'm a side-sleeper, for my own down-side arm when I'm sleepin' alone. Which is most, if not all, of the time.

It would be hard to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots with myself, though, especially with only one arm.

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SimonSwift
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby SimonSwift » Mon Oct 29, 2007 6:40 am UTC

...This is the most ingenious thing ever invented...Except I'm pretty sure I'd be kicking ass in Mario Kart underneath the bed instead. Rock 'Em Sock 'Em can be fun for a bit, but after your dude's head flies off too many times, you just get pissed off, and throw it at the wall. Of course, this phenomenon happens with Mario Kart as well, but the controller can take the beating.


In any case, what a change of heart from the last one.


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Ronfar
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby Ronfar » Mon Oct 29, 2007 6:42 am UTC

This problem was discussed briefly in the movie Mallrats. The solution I came up with is for the two people to stick their lower arms under the pillow. (That's how I normally go to sleep.)
- Doug

JayEye
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Re: "Mattress" Discussion

Postby JayEye » Mon Oct 29, 2007 6:43 am UTC

It wouldn't work for me; I have a captain's bed so that velociraptors won't be able to hide under it.


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