1435: "Presidential Alert"

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The Synologist
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1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby The Synologist » Fri Oct 17, 2014 4:04 am UTC

Image
Title="When putting his kids to bed, after saying "Goodnight", Obama has to stop himself from saying "God bless you, and God bless the United States of America."'"

Very funny one, but I was distracted after reading this by my realization that Randall's comics never have any visibly black people in them.

Also, 2x combo, wewt!

Netreker0
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Netreker0 » Fri Oct 17, 2014 4:32 am UTC

I used to wonder whether Edward R Murrow would tell his kids, "Good night, and good luck." If someone wished me good luck before turning off the lights and leaving me to sleep, I probably would have been terrified.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Coyne » Fri Oct 17, 2014 5:12 am UTC

Given the nature of some buttons the president might be able to access, having a president that pushes random, unknown buttons is...Oh, God, we're all gonna die!!!
In all fairness...

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby kystormchaser » Fri Oct 17, 2014 5:52 am UTC

I LOL'ed at this way harder than I should have.

Thank you Randall for being enough of a nerd to know the President can interrupt everyone through the EAS even though the situations that would require it are becoming more and more limited. Wikipedia is the greatest invention ever.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby MaXer » Fri Oct 17, 2014 6:00 am UTC

Really bad timing, if judging by the cat o'nine tails there.

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Envelope Generator
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Envelope Generator » Fri Oct 17, 2014 6:11 am UTC

The Synologist wrote:I was distracted after reading this by my realization that Randall's comics never have any visibly black people in them.


The people in XKCD are black from the neck down and fluoresce in the dark.
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby orthogon » Fri Oct 17, 2014 6:19 am UTC

Coyne wrote:Given the nature of some buttons the president might be able to access, having a president that pushes random, unknown buttons is...Oh, God, we're all gonna die!!!

On my first reading I actually thought he had pushed that button, and the rest of the strip was him wimping out of 'fessing up, on the basis that everyone's going to die anyway.
xtifr wrote:... and orthogon merely sounds undecided.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby addams » Fri Oct 17, 2014 6:32 am UTC

I think we should have The Leaders on TV, everyday.
It would bore us into doing something else.

I'm still pissed off about the Blondes explaining what people say...
And, Getting it Wrong! Make them speak for themselves!

oh...
yes.
As I was reading the Comic I thought, "That Button? Where's his Hat?"
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Envelope Generator » Fri Oct 17, 2014 6:41 am UTC

addams wrote:I think we should have The Leaders on TV, everyday.
It would bore us into doing something else.


It could be a reality show that hooks everyone.
I'm going to step off the LEM now... here we are, Pismo Beach and all the clams we can eat

eSOANEM wrote:If Fonzie's on the order of 100 zeptokelvin, I think he has bigger problems than difracting through doors.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Al-pocalypse » Fri Oct 17, 2014 6:56 am UTC

Ok I get the comic but I do not get the title text. This is probably because I'm an ignorant foreigner.

Someone explain please.
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby chaoric » Fri Oct 17, 2014 7:00 am UTC

Al-pocalypse wrote:Ok I get the comic but I do not get the title text. This is probably because I'm an ignorant foreigner.

Someone explain please.


The quote in the title text is how the President typically ends all of his speeches.

Edit: Not necessarily that exact quote, but usually along those lines.
Last edited by chaoric on Fri Oct 17, 2014 7:03 am UTC, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Al-pocalypse » Fri Oct 17, 2014 7:02 am UTC

chaoric wrote:
Al-pocalypse wrote:Ok I get the comic but I do not get the title text. This is probably because I'm an ignorant foreigner.

Someone explain please.


The quote in the title text is how the President typically ends all of his speeches.


Cheers!
Ali ;)

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Samik
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Samik » Fri Oct 17, 2014 7:39 am UTC

MaXer wrote:Really bad timing, if judging by the cat o'nine tails there.

I'm, ah, pretty sure that's an American flag.

(Though if you were joking... my sense of humor is often miscalibrated.)

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Pfhorrest
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Pfhorrest » Fri Oct 17, 2014 8:09 am UTC

There should be some country that actually has a "cat o' nine tails" for a flag.
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby ThemePark » Fri Oct 17, 2014 8:28 am UTC

orthogon wrote:
Coyne wrote:Given the nature of some buttons the president might be able to access, having a president that pushes random, unknown buttons is...Oh, God, we're all gonna die!!!

On my first reading I actually thought he had pushed that button, and the rest of the strip was him wimping out of 'fessing up, on the basis that everyone's going to die anyway.

+1
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby hwillis19 » Fri Oct 17, 2014 9:32 am UTC

Hope I wasn't the only one expecting the title text to contain "and masturbate"...

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby orthogon » Fri Oct 17, 2014 10:21 am UTC

hwillis19 wrote:Hope I wasn't the only one expecting the title text to contain "and masturbate"...

Once a day isn't enough. Pump those numbers up, those are rookie numbers in this racket.
xtifr wrote:... and orthogon merely sounds undecided.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Lenoxus » Fri Oct 17, 2014 11:34 am UTC

chaoric wrote:
Al-pocalypse wrote:Ok I get the comic but I do not get the title text. This is probably because I'm an ignorant foreigner.

Someone explain please.


The quote in the title text is how the President typically ends all of his speeches.

Edit: Not necessarily that exact quote, but usually along those lines.


In fact, it's how all US presidents end their speeches going back to Reagan.

I believe that compared to his predecessors, Obama is more likely to add "United States of" before "America". (Arguably, that's more parochial, since there's no room to interpret it as a blessing on two continents.)

Regarding the comic, I'm reminded of Obama's impromptu explanation of transport trucks.

hwillis19 wrote:Hope I wasn't the only one expecting the title text to contain "and masturbate"...


Obama may be famous for ending speeches by exhorting Americans to masturbate, but I don't think he says it so often that he'd accidentally say it to his kids.

EDIT: Or rather, exhorting God to masturbate? Or to bless masturbation? I'm not sure how one should parse "... and God bless the USA and masturbate." But come to think of it, the grammar of "God bless America" is already unusual; it's not a simple imperative statement with God assumed to be the listener (that would be "God, bless America"). It's the result of dropping the "May" at the beginning, though come to think of it Obama usually doesn't do that.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby cellocgw » Fri Oct 17, 2014 11:58 am UTC

hwillis19 wrote:Hope I wasn't the only one expecting the title text to contain "and masturbate"...


We tried that -- it got a Surgeon General of the USA fired for even suggesting it.
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby orthogon » Fri Oct 17, 2014 12:10 pm UTC

Lenoxus wrote:But come to think of it, the grammar of "God bless America" is already unusual; it's not a simple imperative statement with God assumed to be the listener (that would be "God, bless America"). It's the result of dropping the "May" at the beginning, though come to think of it Obama usually doesn't do that.

Discussion of the subjunctive and third-person imperative. Not sure it comes to a conclusion.
xtifr wrote:... and orthogon merely sounds undecided.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby petz » Fri Oct 17, 2014 12:20 pm UTC

A message from the "Oral Orifice"?

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby pkcommando » Fri Oct 17, 2014 12:23 pm UTC

This one is strongly overlapping with my sincere desire to be watching a football and see the following:

Ref: Sorry. I just haven't thrown a flag all game and wanted some attention. You can go back to the game now, everything's fine.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby webdude » Fri Oct 17, 2014 12:23 pm UTC

The Synologist wrote:http://www.xkcd.com/1435
Title="When putting his kids to bed, after saying "Goodnight", Obama has to stop himself from saying "God bless you, and God bless the United States of America."'"

Very funny one, but I was distracted after reading this by my realization that Randall's comics never have any visibly black people in them....


Basic Human Decency makes me want to puke. Are the people in the comics visibly white? No. If anything, they're what many Afro-Americans derogatorily call "Oreos" - black on the outside (the lines), white on the inside (spaces). Look through Randall's comics and tell me how many stick figures you see drawn in other colors.

BTW, Obama has been called an Oreo many times.

==============
I think kudos are due Randall for criticizing the religious PC crap spewed by presidents since St. Reagan (it often seems to me that Republicans treat Reagan like a saint). It seems Clinton didn't invoke God as often as the Republicans and Obama, but today in America religious beliefs trump knowledge, intelligence and rational thought. Religious fundies with their fingers on WMD buttons. Where's the Doomsday clock?
Last edited by webdude on Fri Oct 17, 2014 3:48 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby webdude » Fri Oct 17, 2014 12:26 pm UTC

Wow. P o l itical Corr ectness is auto-edited to "Basic Human Decency"? Why? I missed that thread.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby cellocgw » Fri Oct 17, 2014 12:33 pm UTC

pkcommando wrote:This one is strongly overlapping with my sincere desire to be watching a football and see the following:

Ref: Sorry. I just haven't thrown a flag all game and wanted some attention. You can go back to the game now, everything's fine.


Also known as [mike turned on] "There is no foul on the play. Thank you." [mike turned off]
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby mheney » Fri Oct 17, 2014 1:33 pm UTC

For me, the title text is one of the funniest things that Randall has written. Possibly because it needs no other context fromt he xkcd-verst; it's just stand-alone funny.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby CigarDoug » Fri Oct 17, 2014 1:54 pm UTC

The Synologist wrote:Very funny one, but I was distracted after reading this by my realization that Randall's comics never have any visibly black people in them.

Maybe draw a half-circle for Obama, then?
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby addams » Fri Oct 17, 2014 2:11 pm UTC

webdude wrote:
The Synologist wrote:Image
Title="When putting his kids to bed, after saying "Goodnight", Obama has to stop himself from saying "God bless you, and God bless the United States of America."'"

Very funny one, but I was distracted after reading this by my realization that Randall's comics never have any visibly black people in them....


Basic Human Decency makes me want to puke. Are the people in the comic's visibly white? No. If anything, they're what many Afro-Americans derogatorily call "Oreos" - black on the outside (the lines), white on the inside (spaces). Look through Randall's comics and tell me how many stick figures you see drawn in other colors.

BTW, Obama has been called an Oreo many times.

==============
I think kudos are due Randall for criticizing the religious PC crap spewed by presidents since St. Reagan (it often seems to me that Republicans treat Reagan like a saint). It seems Clinton didn't invoke God as often as the Republicans and Obama, but today in America religious beliefs trump knowledge, intelligence and rational thought. Religious fundies with their fingers on WMD buttons. Where's the Doomsday clock?

Goodness, Webdude;
Arn't you in a Mood.

You and I could really have a Conversation.
We would need Paper. Or; a White Board.

Those old Black Boards are ok.
That would be fun, too.

Where would we start?
I wonder.

Spoiler:
I agree Mr. Barack O' Boma is an Oreo.
It's common. There is no shame in it. (is there?)

I have called the man an Oreo, myself.
People that object to his color, are Wrong.

I say, "He's not Black."
They say, "Look at him."

He was raised in a White Society by White People that Loved him.
He learned to eat what they ate. He learned to read their books.

He was a Lucky, Lucky boy.
He is an admirable Man.

He does not represent, Black Africa.
He represents, His People.

His People are honorable Middle and Upper Middle Class Americans.
They, just, happen to have lived on an Island. That's weird.

That is the Weirdest thing about Obama.
He lived on an Island,

... .connected to the MainLand by AirWaves and ....
...did they have Optical Cables?

ooops...What would You tackle, First?
Life is, just, an exchange of electrons; It is up to us to give it meaning.

We are all in The Gutter.
Some of us see The Gutter.
Some of us see The Stars.
by mr. Oscar Wilde.

Those that want to Know; Know.
Those that do not Know; Don't tell them.
They do terrible things to people that Tell Them.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Gargravarr » Fri Oct 17, 2014 3:42 pm UTC

Reminds me of a scene in cult classic NetForce (1999). Hilarious film if you know even a little about computers. Anyway, in the president's desk drawer there's a gizmo with codes that, when A Button is pressed, will destroy the internet! Because all presidents have a button like that.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby webdude » Fri Oct 17, 2014 4:07 pm UTC

addams wrote:
webdude wrote:
The Synologist wrote:[/url]
Title="When putting his kids to bed, after saying "Goodnight", Obama has to stop himself from saying "God bless you, and God bless the United States of America."'"

Very funny one, but I was distracted after reading this by my realization that Randall's comics never have any visibly black people in them....


Basic Human Decency makes me want to puke. Are the people in the comic's visibly white? No. If anything, they're what many Afro-Americans derogatorily call "Oreos" - black on the outside (the lines), white on the inside (spaces). Look through Randall's comics and tell me how many stick figures you see drawn in other colors.

BTW, Obama has been called an Oreo many times.

==============
I think kudos are due Randall for criticizing the religious PC crap spewed by presidents since St. Reagan (it often seems to me that Republicans treat Reagan like a saint). It seems Clinton didn't invoke God as often as the Republicans and Obama, but today in America religious beliefs trump knowledge, intelligence and rational thought. Religious fundies with their fingers on WMD buttons. Where's the Doomsday clock?


Goodness, Webdude;
Arn't you in a Mood.

You and I could really have a Conversation.
We would need Paper. Or; a White Board.

Those old Black Boards are ok.
That would be fun, too.

Where would we start?
I wonder.

Spoiler:
I agree Mr. Barack O' Boma is an Oreo.
It's common. There is no shame in it. (is there?)

I have called the man an Oreo, myself.
People that object to his color, are Wrong.

I say, "He's not Black."
They say, "Look at him."

He was raised in a White Society by White People that Loved him.
He learned to eat what they ate. He learned to read their books.

He was a Lucky, Lucky boy.
He is an admirable Man.

He does not represent, Black Africa.
He represents, His People.

His People are honorable Middle and Upper Middle Class Americans.
They, just, happen to have lived on an Island. That's weird.

That is the Weirdest thing about Obama.
He lived on an Island,

... .connected to the MainLand by AirWaves and ....
...did they have Optical Cables?

ooops...What would You tackle, First?


I just had a discussion today with some students about the terms "whiteboard" and "blackboard" as I was writing on a green board. I've never seen a black person, nor have I ever seen a white person. I've seen people with light brown skin (sometimes very light) to medium to dark brown (sometimes very dark brown) skin, but never black nor white. [Note: I have a second cousin with albinism; she is not white.] What does it say about humans that most prefer to emphasize, even exaggerate our differences (black vs. white) than emphasize our commonalities (dark brown vs. light brown)?

I agree that Obama would be a far different person had he grown up in Chicago, or almost anywhere else in Illinois, rather than growing up on O'ahu and attending an elite private school.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby da Doctah » Fri Oct 17, 2014 4:24 pm UTC

webdude wrote:Basic Human Decency makes me want to puke. Are the people in the comics visibly white? No. If anything, they're what many Afro-Americans derogatorily call "Oreos" - black on the outside (the lines), white on the inside (spaces). Look through Randall's comics and tell me how many stick figures you see drawn in other colors


"I just realized. Mickey Mouse is black."
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Jackpot777 » Fri Oct 17, 2014 5:13 pm UTC

Envelope Generator wrote:
The Synologist wrote:I was distracted after reading this by my realization that Randall's comics never have any visibly black people in them.


The people in XKCD are black from the neck down and fluoresce in the dark.


And naked. Don't forget naked.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby addams » Fri Oct 17, 2014 5:22 pm UTC

Jackpot777 wrote:
Envelope Generator wrote:
The Synologist wrote:I was distracted after reading this by my realization that Randall's comics never have any visibly black people in them.


The people in XKCD are black from the neck down and fluoresce in the dark.


And naked. Don't forget naked.

Where did they Go?
No one ever told me where they Go.

Poor things.
They lost their Cell Phones.

Now;
They'll notice they are Naked.

oh....A little privacy?
while they get to know one another?

ok....
shhh...
(Don't tell the President.)
Life is, just, an exchange of electrons; It is up to us to give it meaning.

We are all in The Gutter.
Some of us see The Gutter.
Some of us see The Stars.
by mr. Oscar Wilde.

Those that want to Know; Know.
Those that do not Know; Don't tell them.
They do terrible things to people that Tell Them.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby RedwoodRhiadra » Fri Oct 17, 2014 5:27 pm UTC

Netreker0 wrote:I used to wonder whether Edward R Murrow would tell his kids, "Good night, and good luck." If someone wished me good luck before turning off the lights and leaving me to sleep, I probably would have been terrified.


You think that's bad, imagine being forced to recite this *every single night*: "If I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take." Required bedtime prayer for millions upon millions of American children until quite recently. Almost certainly including Mr Murrow's kids.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby MaXer » Fri Oct 17, 2014 6:47 pm UTC

Samik wrote:
MaXer wrote:Really bad timing, if judging by the cat o'nine tails there.

I'm, ah, pretty sure that's an American flag.

(Though if you were joking... my sense of humor is often miscalibrated.)

That is obviously a cat o'nine tails. Also, his hands start out under the desk. I wonder if he's wearing pants. And where Michelle is.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Pfhorrest » Fri Oct 17, 2014 7:11 pm UTC

Under the desk. Duh.
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby addams » Fri Oct 17, 2014 7:23 pm UTC

Pfhorrest wrote:Under the desk. Duh.

Yes, Pfhorrest;
That's Realism in Journalism.

Who Wouldn't?
When does a person outgrow such silliness?

I wonder; What did the Carters do in there?
I know. It's none of my Business.

Didn't some other Nation have The Capital Building, for a while?
I wonder what They did in the Oval Office.

What would you do?
It kind'a depends upon who you are with.

Does it not?

One Boy is a Boy.
Two Boys are half a Boy.
Three Boys is no Boy, at all.

Same is true for many, many adults.

Q. What is the difference between the Boy Scouts and the Army?
A. The Boy Scouts have Adult Supervision.
Life is, just, an exchange of electrons; It is up to us to give it meaning.

We are all in The Gutter.
Some of us see The Gutter.
Some of us see The Stars.
by mr. Oscar Wilde.

Those that want to Know; Know.
Those that do not Know; Don't tell them.
They do terrible things to people that Tell Them.

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Reecer6
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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Reecer6 » Sat Oct 18, 2014 1:33 am UTC

webdude wrote:I just had a discussion today with some students about the terms "whiteboard" and "blackboard" as I was writing on a green board.

The real moral issue is, is it ever a good idea to write on a blackboard? Not only does it require cleaning the erasers when you don't even need anything more than a finger for whiteboards, but also there's the incredibly well-known and well-hated nails-on-a-chalkboard sound. Upgrade to the present.

Anyways, I never noticed the basic human decency find and replace (which is good shown by the context here), but I'm going to talk about the comic. Specifically, how is he being recorded? He hits that button and what, a cameraman runs in? Is there a spring-loaded camera that pops out of the front of the desk? And where is this button hidden, anyways, if it's within arms-length from the chair in the Oval Office?

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby Invertin » Sat Oct 18, 2014 1:46 am UTC

Reecer6 wrote:And where is this button hidden, anyways, if it's within arms-length from the chair in the Oval Office?


I always liked to imagine there were hundreds of hidden buttons under the desk of the oval office where the president can do president things by using the oval office like a country cockpit.

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Re: 1435: "Presidential Alert"

Postby addams » Sat Oct 18, 2014 2:12 am UTC

Reecer6 wrote:
Anyways, I never noticed the basic human decency find and replace (which is good shown by the context here), but I'm going to talk about the comic. Specifically, how is he being recorded? He hits that button and what, a cameraman runs in? Is there a spring-loaded camera that pops out of the front of the desk? And where is this button hidden, anyways, if it's within arms-length from the chair in the Oval Office?


oh.
Umm.
I thought it was something simple like,

He is sitting at his fancy computer in his cool office.
He there is a sticky note. It says, "Shift-Control-3" or some such thing.

He's the President of the United States!
He does not have to ask permission to go, "Shift-Control-3"!

The screen goes Black.
The screen goes Blue with lines.
He hears a real Voice of Authority, "Mr. President. You are on E.A.S., Sir."

An unprepared president reminds us to Floss.
I find it charming.

It's a step better than, "Now; Go Shopping!"
Life is, just, an exchange of electrons; It is up to us to give it meaning.

We are all in The Gutter.
Some of us see The Gutter.
Some of us see The Stars.
by mr. Oscar Wilde.

Those that want to Know; Know.
Those that do not Know; Don't tell them.
They do terrible things to people that Tell Them.


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