Awesome Student Quotes

The school experience. School related queries, discussions, and stories that aren't specific to a subject.

Moderators: gmalivuk, Moderators General, Prelates

User avatar
Cadvin
Posts: 38
Joined: Thu Feb 19, 2009 12:23 am UTC

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Cadvin » Sun Mar 29, 2009 12:32 am UTC

Science teacher: So, can anybody think of any useful traits for an animal?
Student E: A fat panda bear.
Teacher: Yeah... I guess that could work.

----------------------------

Student T: Where do babies come from?
Same student E: From Walmart. In the tire section.

----------------------------

English teacher: (Reading the Code of Conduct, for sexual harassment): I swear they put most of this stuff in here just to embarrass us...

----------------------------

And lastly, when me and my partners were up in front to present out skit think, we stood there awkwardly for several seconds, and hear a laughtrack. It turns out that the same student E had brought a recorded laughtrack to school, and was playing it at the best times, (and trying to get caught).

User avatar
Monika
Welcoming Aarvark
Posts: 3673
Joined: Mon Aug 18, 2008 8:03 am UTC
Location: Germany, near Heidelberg
Contact:

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Monika » Sun Mar 29, 2009 1:03 pm UTC

Why the tire section?
#xkcd-q on irc.foonetic.net - the LGBTIQQA support channel
Please donate to help these people

User avatar
TaintedDeity
Posts: 4003
Joined: Sun Feb 10, 2008 7:22 pm UTC
Location: England;

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby TaintedDeity » Sun Mar 29, 2009 1:16 pm UTC

They grow in the middle, keeps them out of the wind.
Ⓞⓞ◯

User avatar
Cadvin
Posts: 38
Joined: Thu Feb 19, 2009 12:23 am UTC

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Cadvin » Sun Mar 29, 2009 10:42 pm UTC

No clue. That's what made it funny.

User avatar
pseudoidiot
Sexy Beard Man
Posts: 5101
Joined: Mon Apr 21, 2008 9:30 pm UTC
Location: Kansas City
Contact:

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby pseudoidiot » Mon Mar 30, 2009 3:58 am UTC

I assumed it was a michelin baby reference.
Derailed : Gaming Outside the Box.
SecondTalon wrote:*swoons* I love you, all powerful pseudoidiot!
ShootTheChicken wrote:I can't stop thinking about pseudoidiot's penis.

User avatar
joshz
Posts: 1466
Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2008 2:51 am UTC
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby joshz » Mon Mar 30, 2009 11:17 pm UTC

I was talking about slavery in a class about Quakerism (Quaker school :P). It was a skit-type thing. I was a strongly-anti slavery person, and passed someone wearing a cotton shirt.
"You shouldn't wear cotton shirts. They're made from slaves!"
(I meant to say "from slave labor", but it was the day after spring break and I was tired.)

I felt dumb.

Addendum: I put that as my facebook status, because it was funny. Then a jackass kid who no one really likes commented on it, "your an idiot". It was funny. (in an ironic way, in case you didn't catch that.)
You, sir, name? wrote:If you have over 26 levels of nesting, you've got bigger problems ... than variable naming.
suffer-cait wrote:it might also be interesting to note here that i don't like 5 fingers. they feel too bulky.

User avatar
Isotope_238
Posts: 285
Joined: Fri Mar 27, 2009 9:59 pm UTC
Location: The Galaxy of a Thousand Rubies

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Isotope_238 » Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:32 pm UTC

"The search for truth ends with ice cream!"

User avatar
Vicariously-Kaiser
Posts: 17
Joined: Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:50 pm UTC
Location: Far far away.

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Vicariously-Kaiser » Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:52 pm UTC

When in an Religion class talking about God my friend says
"Maybe God just didn't like 6million Jews"

Its a little harsh, but it was funny at the time.

User avatar
joshz
Posts: 1466
Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2008 2:51 am UTC
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby joshz » Tue Mar 31, 2009 10:44 pm UTC

Vicariously-Kaiser wrote:When in an Religion class talking about God my friend says
"Maybe God just didn't like 6million Jews"

Its a little harsh, but it was funny at the time.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's not funny. Like, at all.
You, sir, name? wrote:If you have over 26 levels of nesting, you've got bigger problems ... than variable naming.
suffer-cait wrote:it might also be interesting to note here that i don't like 5 fingers. they feel too bulky.

User avatar
izzythefirst
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2009 10:59 pm UTC

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby izzythefirst » Tue Mar 31, 2009 11:05 pm UTC

today at lunch:
E: My mom is not a lesbian cat lover!! My mom is not dating my friend Catherine!!!


haha this happened yesterday too.. we have the wierdest convos at lunch.. :P :)
J: OW! My head!!
*smack*
J: OW! My other head!!

grapefruit1
Posts: 77
Joined: Thu Mar 05, 2009 5:11 pm UTC
Location: The Yellow Couch

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby grapefruit1 » Tue Mar 31, 2009 11:11 pm UTC

To further demonstrate Izzy's point: a portion of our conversation yesterday.

Me: ...and they were talking about this girl who was pregnant by a college guy.
E: You're pregnant??
Me: What? No! There's these girls, and they were talking about someone who was pregnant with a college guy's baby...
E: Oh, I thought you said the girls got you pregnant!
*silence*
A: That's a physical impossibility!
Me: Where'd you get that?
H: Emily's pregnant?
M (from the table behind us): What are you guys talking about over there?
Me: Beats the hell out of me!
"If someone asks you, 'Are you ticklish?', it doesn't matter whether you answer yes or no. They're going to touch you."
- Demetri Martin

User avatar
rubber314chicken
Posts: 595
Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2008 3:07 am UTC

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby rubber314chicken » Wed Apr 01, 2009 12:43 am UTC

Monika wrote:Why the tire section?


because its random and makes no sense.
Official Thread-Jacker

SecondTalon wrote:Semen! I said semen! tee hee!

User avatar
shnieder2
Posts: 26
Joined: Sat Feb 07, 2009 1:26 am UTC
Location: Anywhere there is cookies.

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby shnieder2 » Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:12 am UTC

"Racism is caused by people who care"

User avatar
joshz
Posts: 1466
Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2008 2:51 am UTC
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby joshz » Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:12 am UTC

shnieder2 wrote:"Racism is caused by people who care"
Sorry, what? Please explain this. Because to me it sounds like you're being a horrible person.
You, sir, name? wrote:If you have over 26 levels of nesting, you've got bigger problems ... than variable naming.
suffer-cait wrote:it might also be interesting to note here that i don't like 5 fingers. they feel too bulky.

User avatar
benjhuey
Posts: 3328
Joined: Sat Sep 08, 2007 2:35 am UTC
Location: A collection of rocks

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby benjhuey » Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:17 am UTC

joshz wrote:
shnieder2 wrote:"Racism is caused by people who care"
Sorry, what? Please explain this. Because to me it sounds like you're being a horrible person.
Sounds to me like he is simply quoting someone else who is being a horrible person. For example, "Hitler was right."
多么现在棕色母牛?

User avatar
joshz
Posts: 1466
Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2008 2:51 am UTC
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby joshz » Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:18 am UTC

benjhuey wrote:
joshz wrote:
shnieder2 wrote:"Racism is caused by people who care"
Sorry, what? Please explain this. Because to me it sounds like you're being a horrible person.
Sounds to me like he is simply quoting someone else who is being a horrible person. For example, "Hitler was right."
But it's in a thread called "Awesome Student Quotes", which implies, no, outright says, he thinks that quote is awesome for some reason, which he needs to explain.
You, sir, name? wrote:If you have over 26 levels of nesting, you've got bigger problems ... than variable naming.
suffer-cait wrote:it might also be interesting to note here that i don't like 5 fingers. they feel too bulky.

User avatar
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
As the Arbiter of Everything, Everything Sucks
Posts: 8314
Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2007 6:17 pm UTC
Location: I FUCKING MOVED TO THE WOODS

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ » Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:31 am UTC

...sarcasm can be awesome too...
Heyyy baby wanna kill all humans?

User avatar
benjhuey
Posts: 3328
Joined: Sat Sep 08, 2007 2:35 am UTC
Location: A collection of rocks

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby benjhuey » Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:44 am UTC

It's awesome because it's so blatantly wrong? "Awesome" doesn't always carry positive connotations.
多么现在棕色母牛?

User avatar
joshz
Posts: 1466
Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2008 2:51 am UTC
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby joshz » Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:47 am UTC

Eh. Without context, it's hard to tell. Which is why I asked him/her to explain.
You, sir, name? wrote:If you have over 26 levels of nesting, you've got bigger problems ... than variable naming.
suffer-cait wrote:it might also be interesting to note here that i don't like 5 fingers. they feel too bulky.

sje46
Posts: 4730
Joined: Wed May 14, 2008 4:41 am UTC
Location: New Hampshire

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby sje46 » Wed Apr 01, 2009 3:47 am UTC

I have to admit I laughed hard in the one episode of South Park. I think CArtman had to not say anything anti-semitic because of Kyle 1 (Kyle's cousin, who is very stereotypically Jewish), and in the middle of class Kyle one says: "Is anyone else having problems concentrating on this? I just can't seem to concentrate."
to which Cartman replies "Maybe we should send you to a concentration camp."
It was pretty funny, in the context of the episode.
General_Norris: Taking pride in your nation is taking pride in the division of humanity.
Pirate.Bondage: Let's get married. Right now.

Hit3k
Posts: 1156
Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2007 9:12 am UTC
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Contact:

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Hit3k » Wed Apr 01, 2009 4:25 am UTC

sje46 wrote:I have to admit I laughed hard in the one episode of South Park. I think CArtman had to not say anything anti-semitic because of Kyle 1 (Kyle's cousin, who is very stereotypically Jewish), and in the middle of class Kyle one says: "Is anyone else having problems concentrating on this? I just can't seem to concentrate."
to which Cartman replies "Maybe we should send you to a concentration camp."
It was pretty funny, in the context of the episode.


Shouldn't... laugh..... mushan't.......nhao....hahahahahahaha
Sungura wrote:My mom made me watch a star wars. Two of them , actually. The Death Star one and the one where the dude ends up in the swamp with the weird guy who talks funny.

Chuff
CHOO CHOO I'M A TRAIN
Posts: 1018
Joined: Mon Feb 16, 2009 8:45 am UTC
Location: The Purple Valley, Mass

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Chuff » Wed Apr 01, 2009 5:33 am UTC

It could just be the blatant racism inspires awe.
The Great Hippo wrote:The internet's chief exports are cute kittens, porn, and Reasons Why You Are Completely Fucking Wrong.
addams wrote:How human of him. "If, they can do it, then, I can do it." Humans. Pfft. Poor us.

User avatar
shnieder2
Posts: 26
Joined: Sat Feb 07, 2009 1:26 am UTC
Location: Anywhere there is cookies.

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby shnieder2 » Wed Apr 01, 2009 11:58 pm UTC

First off let me say that I am in no way a racist and neither is my friend who said this. What happened was that we were in French class reading our school newspaper, and there was this really bad article about racism. It wasn't that well written it was about the cause of racism in school or something like that and we were just joking around and he said that line. And it was meant as racism is caused by people who care, they care just care about stupid things.

Sorry if I caused anyone to go up in arms, but I am actually happy that someone said that or else it would be unexplained. I forgot that it seems rude out of context. :oops:

One more time just to be sure I do not encourage racism of any kind. Not even against pygmy shrews.

User avatar
joshz
Posts: 1466
Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2008 2:51 am UTC
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby joshz » Thu Apr 02, 2009 12:08 am UTC

Ahh, that makes sense now. That context would have helped a lot, :lol: .
You, sir, name? wrote:If you have over 26 levels of nesting, you've got bigger problems ... than variable naming.
suffer-cait wrote:it might also be interesting to note here that i don't like 5 fingers. they feel too bulky.

User avatar
shnieder2
Posts: 26
Joined: Sat Feb 07, 2009 1:26 am UTC
Location: Anywhere there is cookies.

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby shnieder2 » Thu Apr 02, 2009 12:50 am UTC

Sorry about not putting context in, I was sorta rushed, and I am a little forgetful.

User avatar
joshz
Posts: 1466
Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2008 2:51 am UTC
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby joshz » Thu Apr 02, 2009 12:51 am UTC

Nah, it's cool, now that you've explained it.
You, sir, name? wrote:If you have over 26 levels of nesting, you've got bigger problems ... than variable naming.
suffer-cait wrote:it might also be interesting to note here that i don't like 5 fingers. they feel too bulky.

User avatar
izzythefirst
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2009 10:59 pm UTC

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby izzythefirst » Thu Apr 02, 2009 4:05 am UTC

oh my gosh today (at the end of the day)

A: I CAN POOP CUBES!!!!!!!!!

note: our teacher was right in front of us.. this conversation was actually about Frogs, Fleas, and Cubes.. but then we were saying the frogs would eat the fleas so we only needed the frogs, then because these frogs ate the fleas, cubes would come out.. :P haha had to be there :D had to be there :)
J: OW! My head!!
*smack*
J: OW! My other head!!

grapefruit1
Posts: 77
Joined: Thu Mar 05, 2009 5:11 pm UTC
Location: The Yellow Couch

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby grapefruit1 » Fri Apr 03, 2009 12:36 am UTC

Me: We're trying to hug you, not eviscerate you!
---
Me: Oh come on, you act like I've murdered your child!
---
Me: That man looks angry.
J: That's because he's angry.
Me: That would explain it.

It was funnier at the time.
---
But the best one of all?

J on April Fool's: Hey guys, I have a new plan to take over the world, wanna hear it? *We all nod and huddle in close.* Okay.....WE'RE NO STRANGERS TO LO-O-OVE. You know the rules, and so do I!

That's right. She rickroll'd us.
"If someone asks you, 'Are you ticklish?', it doesn't matter whether you answer yes or no. They're going to touch you."
- Demetri Martin

User avatar
joshz
Posts: 1466
Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2008 2:51 am UTC
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby joshz » Fri Apr 03, 2009 12:52 am UTC

grapefruit1 wrote:J on April Fool's: Hey guys, I have a new plan to take over the world, wanna hear it? *We all nod and huddle in close.* Okay.....WE'RE NO STRANGERS TO LO-O-OVE. You know the rules, and so do I!

That's right. She rickroll'd us.
Hehehehe. Awesome. <3 J, whoever that is.
You, sir, name? wrote:If you have over 26 levels of nesting, you've got bigger problems ... than variable naming.
suffer-cait wrote:it might also be interesting to note here that i don't like 5 fingers. they feel too bulky.

nahvkolaj
Posts: 26
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2009 5:12 pm UTC

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby nahvkolaj » Fri Apr 03, 2009 6:23 am UTC

in Anthro lecture yesterday:

the professor was going on about how Darwin was the greatest scientist of them all and how his theory never had to be altered and how guys like Newton and Einstein get way too much credit for work that is not nearly as significant as Darwin's.

student speaks up "But Darwin did not invent calculus so he could do physics."

User avatar
zombiefeynman
Posts: 211
Joined: Thu Apr 02, 2009 4:16 pm UTC

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby zombiefeynman » Fri Apr 03, 2009 2:26 pm UTC

In a Chemistry, reviewing for a test. The class was really behind.

Teacher: Okay, we need to step on the accelerator and speed up a bit.
S1: Wait! You might break the speed limit, why should we do that?
S2: Because we should have been at the party five hours ago!

rezolution
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat Nov 03, 2007 12:30 pm UTC

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby rezolution » Sat Apr 04, 2009 12:03 pm UTC

From a third year Relativity/Cosmology lecture:

Lecturer: "Tachyons are theoretical particles that travel faster than the speed of light. They also have imaginary mass."
Student: "Like Anorexic people."

2nd year Differential Equations:

Lecturer: "The Taylor Series is spelled out in your notes"
Student: "T... A... Y... L..."

2nd year Chemistry (after lengthy monologue on quantum in chemistry)

Lecturer: "...so how can this happen?"
Student: "Because quantum's f*cked!"

I've got a book of quotes I keep, but I think this is all I can submit to the "student quotes" board at the moment, but I shall keep an eye out for more later, and when I actually have my book with me.

EDIT'd for recalled quote and typo fixing

User avatar
Sp00n
Posts: 148
Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2009 6:32 am UTC
Location: Sydney

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Sp00n » Sat Apr 04, 2009 2:32 pm UTC

Nicole: Jeez. It's really cold today!

Me: I don't think it's that cold...

Nicole: That's because you hibernate!

---

Teacher:Can anyone name some former states of Soviet Russia?

Me:Czech?

Nicole:(triumphantly) JAPAN!
"Did she kiss as good as me?"

"As well as you.
"

User avatar
Monika
Welcoming Aarvark
Posts: 3673
Joined: Mon Aug 18, 2008 8:03 am UTC
Location: Germany, near Heidelberg
Contact:

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Monika » Sat Apr 04, 2009 3:08 pm UTC

She was only slightly less wrong than you ;)
#xkcd-q on irc.foonetic.net - the LGBTIQQA support channel
Please donate to help these people

User avatar
izzythefirst
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2009 10:59 pm UTC

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby izzythefirst » Sat Apr 04, 2009 3:56 pm UTC

joshz wrote:
grapefruit1 wrote:J on April Fool's: Hey guys, I have a new plan to take over the world, wanna hear it? *We all nod and huddle in close.* Okay.....WE'RE NO STRANGERS TO LO-O-OVE. You know the rules, and so do I!

That's right. She rickroll'd us.
Hehehehe. Awesome. <3 J, whoever that is.

haha i really wouldn't be so sure about that <3 J part.. believe me.. ;)
J: OW! My head!!
*smack*
J: OW! My other head!!

User avatar
Alpha Omicron
Posts: 2765
Joined: Thu May 10, 2007 1:07 pm UTC

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Alpha Omicron » Sat Apr 04, 2009 4:00 pm UTC

Russia would have been the easy one.
Here is a link to a page which leverages aggregation of my tweetbook social blogomedia.

User avatar
Sp00n
Posts: 148
Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2009 6:32 am UTC
Location: Sydney

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Sp00n » Sun Apr 05, 2009 8:00 am UTC

Monika wrote:She was only slightly less wrong than you ;)

Czech republic then?

Or am I just being a doofus?
"Did she kiss as good as me?"

"As well as you.
"

User avatar
Monika
Welcoming Aarvark
Posts: 3673
Joined: Mon Aug 18, 2008 8:03 am UTC
Location: Germany, near Heidelberg
Contact:

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Monika » Sun Apr 05, 2009 12:38 pm UTC

You are ;) . The Czech Republic (or Czechoslovakia at the time) was not part of the Soviet Union. Nor were Poland, the GDR (East Germany), Bulgaria, Romania, Hungary, Yugoslavia or Albania, even though they were certainly socialist countries under the control of the Soviet Union (okay, Yugoslavia and Albania were not really under their control).

Countries that were part of the Soviet Union: Russia, Latvia, Lithuania, Estonia, the Ukraine, Belarus, Moldova, Armenia, Azerbaijan, Georgia, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Tajikistan, Turkmenistan, Uzbekistan. As you see by the beginning alphabetical ordering I had to look up all of those which are not in Europe.

But I have to correct what I wrote: She was not slightly, she was a lot more wrong than you :) . And it was a very funny quote.

A somewhat similar quote from my fifth or sixth grade geography class:

Teacher: What's the capital of Switzerland?
Students: Zurich? Geneva? Basel? Berne? Vienna? Linz? Salzburg? Genua? Liechtenstein?

(For the record: It's Berne and not all of the cities called out are even in Switzerland.)
#xkcd-q on irc.foonetic.net - the LGBTIQQA support channel
Please donate to help these people

User avatar
Chfan
Posts: 2141
Joined: Sun Oct 19, 2008 10:26 pm UTC
Location: American East Coast

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Chfan » Sun Apr 05, 2009 12:43 pm UTC

They're all in the general area, though, so...foul play, perhaps?
Just FYI, the guy isn't avatar isn't me. But he seems pretty cool.

User avatar
Monika
Welcoming Aarvark
Posts: 3673
Joined: Mon Aug 18, 2008 8:03 am UTC
Location: Germany, near Heidelberg
Contact:

Re: Awesome Student Quotes

Postby Monika » Sun Apr 05, 2009 12:53 pm UTC

Foul play?
#xkcd-q on irc.foonetic.net - the LGBTIQQA support channel
Please donate to help these people


Return to “School”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 6 guests