Noob Drinks

Apparently, people like to eat.

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Noob Drinks

Postby the_phoenix612 » Mon Sep 28, 2009 3:34 am UTC

What makes a beverage a "chick drink"?

Clearly, fruity things with umbrellas are chick drinks, especially if they are pink, but who ever decided that if a drink tastes good/is sweet, it is only fit for female consumption?

Also, what is the attraction in drinking beer? Tastes like shit to me...
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby ParanoidAndroid » Mon Sep 28, 2009 3:38 am UTC

the_phoenix612 wrote:What makes a beverage a "chick drink"?

Egg yolks.

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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Aetius » Mon Sep 28, 2009 3:40 am UTC

Like much of our culture, a chick drink is anything that someone can convince you is a chick drink.

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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby PictureSarah » Mon Sep 28, 2009 3:50 am UTC

ParanoidAndroid wrote:
the_phoenix612 wrote:What makes a beverage a "chick drink"?

Egg yolks.


This made me giggle quite a bit, and then I felt like a huge dork.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Hawknc » Mon Sep 28, 2009 3:52 am UTC

the_phoenix612 wrote:Clearly, fruity things with umbrellas are chick drinks

Why?
the_phoenix612 wrote:Also, what is the attraction in drinking beer? Tastes like shit to me...

Sucks to be you, then. Or you've tried naught but bilgewater and have not yet been exposed to the finer things in life.

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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby SecondTalon » Mon Sep 28, 2009 3:54 am UTC

the_phoenix612 wrote:What makes a beverage a "chick drink"?

Clearly, fruity things with umbrellas are chick drinks, especially if they are pink, but who ever decided that if a drink tastes good/is sweet, it is only fit for female consumption?

Also, what is the attraction in drinking beer? Tastes like shit to me...
Hemingway drank Mojitos. Your argument is invalid.

Stop drinking swill.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby suffer-cait » Mon Sep 28, 2009 3:57 am UTC

chick drinks are called as such because someone somewhere decided that anyone who drinks them are not 'manly' enough to drink stuff that tastes like shit. because drinking anything, crap or not, is manly.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Fledermen64 » Mon Sep 28, 2009 4:12 am UTC

Anything that is to sweet for my tastes but seem to be popular with womenfolk on the whole is something i would deem a chick drink. I guess im just lucky i enjoy tequila with possibly a spritz of lime so ive never been made fun of for my drink choice.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby the_phoenix612 » Mon Sep 28, 2009 4:15 am UTC

SecondTalon wrote:
the_phoenix612 wrote:What makes a beverage a "chick drink"?

Clearly, fruity things with umbrellas are chick drinks, especially if they are pink, but who ever decided that if a drink tastes good/is sweet, it is only fit for female consumption?

Also, what is the attraction in drinking beer? Tastes like shit to me...
Hemingway drank Mojitos. Your argument is invalid.

Stop drinking swill.

/me is new to drinking.

:(

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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Cold » Mon Sep 28, 2009 5:08 am UTC

I figured this would be as good a time as any to refer to JD's taste for apple tini's(in Scrubs).
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Izawwlgood » Mon Sep 28, 2009 5:16 am UTC

Then I for one would prefer if you wouldn't knock what you don't appreciate.

There there sweet Modelo, he just said it because he's a big fat idiot! Yes he is, a widdlewiddle idiot. What's that you say? You're leaving me for a daquiri?! Aww, you never share.

Get over it. Drinks can be delicious without being 'chick drinks'. Just because you find some weird blow to your masculinity to be seeing adding alcohol to something doesn't mean the rest of us weren't blending booze into our beverages while you were still sipping from juice boxes. Which incidentally, make GREAT mix drinks.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Plasma Man » Mon Sep 28, 2009 10:40 am UTC

I agree. I've only recently discovered how nice cocktails and so-called chick drinks can be. A decent pint would still be my drink of choice, but I'm glad to have discovered more drinks that I like. I'm hoping to organise going out for cocktails with some friends this week, there's a new cocktail bar opened in town and I'd like to give it a go.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Amarantha » Mon Sep 28, 2009 12:26 pm UTC

This chick is all about beer, whisky and hardcore cocktails.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Decker » Mon Sep 28, 2009 12:37 pm UTC

Amarantha wrote:This chick is all about beer, whisky and hardcore cocktails.

And this guy is all about pink fruity drinks with umbrellas in them. And after trying many beers I still havent found one I can stomach.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby bigglesworth » Mon Sep 28, 2009 1:55 pm UTC

SecondTalon wrote:Hemingway drank Mojitos. Your argument is invalid.
Actually I think he was better known for drinking daiquiris, a far girlier drink in the scheme of things. So the argument is utterly invalid.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Belial » Mon Sep 28, 2009 2:01 pm UTC

Hemingway drank a *lot* of things. It was kindof his thing.

Death in the Afternoon was one of his, too. And that's a mix drink you sip out of a bloody champagne flute.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Decker » Mon Sep 28, 2009 2:10 pm UTC

Belial wrote:Hemingway drank a *lot* of things. It was kindof his thing.

Death in the Afternoon was one of his, too. And that's a mix drink you sip out of a bloody champagne flute.

It also has a Jigger of absinth in it. From what I heard about absinth it could probably put you in no condition to drive rather fast.
Then again, that's the danger of any overly sweet mixed drink.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Rinsaikeru » Mon Sep 28, 2009 2:19 pm UTC

My dad's favourite is a Singapore Sling-- so pink.

I tend to dock a bajillion man points from anyone who calls a drink chick or girlie myself...
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby ASmileWithoutACat » Mon Sep 28, 2009 4:28 pm UTC

Wow- I was actually discussing this about an hour after the OP. Weird... are you people in my head like Randall now?

Anyway, I think what came out of our conversation was that piña coladas (piñas colada) are rather girly (especially virgin ones, but there was a good excuse for those), and that appletinis are probably the most girly drinks that are readily available. I report this only in the interest of supplying some popular opinions to provide data, which can be analyzed to determine what factors contribute to "girliness". I have no clue, myself, and don't particularly care- my one comment was that I had figured I was considered a bit frilly for sticking to vodka collinses, but I was told those were fairly manly. (Imaginary) Facts I did not know! Hooray!

Also, beer: Do people really consider it that good? I had figured beer-drinking was mostly a macho/socially-expected type thing. The bad stuff tastes like it was produced by an incontinent cat, and I've had better beers, but 'good' beer to me tastes- mostly tolerable. Does it really taste good to people, and is that a purely acquired taste? Sorry, I don't mean to sound dismissive- I think this may be related to my belief that cocktails were invented as a way to drink alcohol while pretending you aren't, because nobody in their right mind would drink something that tastes so foul. Beer tastes too plainly of ethanol for me.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby clintonius » Mon Sep 28, 2009 4:44 pm UTC

the_phoenix612 wrote:I was given a Sam Adams Oktoberfest and a Shiner Hefeweizen. Neither was any good.

I can confirm that, if you do not like Shiner Hefe, you do not like beer. Such is life.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Belial » Mon Sep 28, 2009 4:55 pm UTC

ASmileWithoutACat wrote:Also, beer: Do people really consider it that good? I had figured beer-drinking was mostly a macho/socially-expected type thing. The bad stuff tastes like it was produced by an incontinent cat, and I've had better beers, but 'good' beer to me tastes- mostly tolerable. Does it really taste good to people, and is that a purely acquired taste? Sorry, I don't mean to sound dismissive- I think this may be related to my belief that cocktails were invented as a way to drink alcohol while pretending you aren't, because nobody in their right mind would drink something that tastes so foul. Beer tastes too plainly of ethanol for me.


You may just not like it.

Trust me when I say that I and others I know *really really do*. I wouldn't quite say it's an acquired taste, but I had to find the right types of beer, and the right brands, and then....yum.

However, if the alcohol taste in *beer* is too strong, you may be doomed. Most beers are between 5 and 10 percent alcohol, which is...not a lot, honestly. At list when compared to most liquors.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby ASmileWithoutACat » Mon Sep 28, 2009 5:08 pm UTC

Belial wrote:
ASmileWithoutACat wrote:Also, beer: Do people really consider it that good? I had figured beer-drinking was mostly a macho/socially-expected type thing. The bad stuff tastes like it was produced by an incontinent cat, and I've had better beers, but 'good' beer to me tastes- mostly tolerable. Does it really taste good to people, and is that a purely acquired taste? Sorry, I don't mean to sound dismissive- I think this may be related to my belief that cocktails were invented as a way to drink alcohol while pretending you aren't, because nobody in their right mind would drink something that tastes so foul. Beer tastes too plainly of ethanol for me.


You may just not like it.

Trust me when I say that I and others I know *really really do*. I wouldn't quite say it's an acquired taste, but I had to find the right types of beer, and the right brands, and then....yum.

However, if the alcohol taste in *beer* is too strong, you may be doomed. Most beers are between 5 and 10 percent alcohol, which is...not a lot, honestly. At list when compared to most liquors.


Well, I did say the taste, not the actual content. 5-10% alcohol is fine- I think beer (at least that I've tried) just doesn't taste strong enough to cover it for me. Maybe fruit flavors just distract me better; fruit goes on the list of distractions, along with the shiny things, then.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby SecondTalon » Mon Sep 28, 2009 5:32 pm UTC

Re: Beer

Imagine, if you will, that you've spent your entire life with your options essentially being to drink flat, watered down cola or to just drink water or tea or something. Of course you're going to prefer water or tea over the horrible taste of the flat, watered down cola. Maybe you discover a particular one that's merely watered down. Maybe you find one that's not that watered down and only sorta flat, so you think "I guess this is what people are talking about or something.. it's still pretty nasty."

Then one magical day, someone hands you a cola that is neither flat nor watered down. It tastes exactly like a cola should taste. And you think "Holy crap, this is what people have been talking about!"

That was basically me and beer. As always, your mileage may vary wildly. But I can suggest a few places to start - Bass Pale Ale, Newcastle Brown Ale, Red Stripe Lager, Smithwicks Draught, Shiner Bock....
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Belial » Mon Sep 28, 2009 6:05 pm UTC

Sam Adams Summer Beer is also nice. Unfortunately, it is no longer summer. Some of their winter holiday brews are also quite acceptable.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Azrael » Mon Sep 28, 2009 6:21 pm UTC

ASmileWithoutACat wrote:... and that appletinis are probably the most girly drinks that are readily available. I report this only in the interest of supplying some popular opinions to provide data, which can be analyzed to determine what factors contribute to "girliness".

Cosmos might be a contender. Anyhow, there is only one characteristic needed for a libation to fall into this ridiculously useless categorization:

1) Sweet

No, really. That's it. Although there are probably some offshoots: "So sweet you can't taste the alcohol" or "Uses vodka as the base spirit so as to avoid the drink actually tasting like anything with alcohol" and last but not least "Balance, what's balance when you have corn syrup?"

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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Belial » Mon Sep 28, 2009 6:29 pm UTC

Man, I move to rename them from their current sexist appelation to "noob drinks". Because really, they aren't preferred by women in my experience, they're preferred by inexperienced drinkers of both sexes. All the women I know who are experienced drinkers prefer either beer or ridiculously dry or floral cocktails that bear no resemblance to this sugary bullshit.

Meanwhile, all the guys I know who barely drink, or haven't been drinking long, drink things like appletinis and white russians.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby tin » Mon Sep 28, 2009 6:47 pm UTC

Belial wrote: Because really, they aren't preferred by women in my experience, they're preferred by inexperienced drinkers of both sexes.


This. Myself and most people I know started on alcohol as teenagers with sugary alcopops like Hooch and Bacardi Breezers. Hell, we used to mix vodka with apple flavoured Tango to smuggle into clubs we were sneaking in to. This was because we were inexperienced and pretty much just wanted to feel the affects of alcohol on it's own i.e getting completely rat arsed. Appreciation of things like neat liquor, wine or beer came with time.

Although, nothing can beat a good black Russian or mojito cocktail.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Decker » Mon Sep 28, 2009 7:32 pm UTC

Belial wrote:Man, I move to rename them from their current sexist appelation to "noob drinks". Because really, they aren't preferred by women in my experience, they're preferred by inexperienced drinkers of both sexes. All the women I know who are experienced drinkers prefer either beer or ridiculously dry or floral cocktails that bear no resemblance to this sugary bullshit.

Meanwhile, all the guys I know who barely drink, or haven't been drinking long, drink things like appletinis and white russians.

As a noob drinker, I move to rename the thread.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Azrael » Mon Sep 28, 2009 7:59 pm UTC

Belial wrote:Man, I move to rename them from their current sexist appelation to "noob drinks"

So I guess calling them Tart-tinis is right out?

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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Ralith The Third » Tue Sep 29, 2009 1:30 am UTC

This makes me think of this sauce at this restaurant. I have never met anyone who likes women exclusively who likes it, but if you like men, exclusively or no, it's the best thing ever. It's realllly wierd.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Izawwlgood » Tue Sep 29, 2009 4:04 am UTC

SecondTalon wrote:Bass Pale Ale, Newcastle Brown Ale, Red Stripe Lager, Smithwicks Draught, Shiner Bock


Now, you usually have sagely advice, and usually when reading your posts I give a nod and think to myself "Hmm. Yeah. I dig it."

I'm not generally a fan of blowing smoke up the arses of the many intelligent people on this fora, but you sir, win a cookie for the really dead on 'Good Starter Beer Appreciation' picks. I move to add Modelo and Becks to the list. A list that could perhaps, be used to guide the young initiates towards the wonder that is beer.

Smithwicks is my 'safety beer' when getting to know a new bartender.
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Re: Noob Drinks

Postby TheSkyMovesSideways » Tue Sep 29, 2009 4:05 am UTC

Belial wrote:Man, I move to rename them from their current sexist appelation to "noob drinks".

I... like this idea. I've been lamenting for a while the lack of a descriptor for these things which isn't misogynistic, homophobic or transphobic.

Meanwhile, all the guys I know who barely drink, or haven't been drinking long, drink things like appletinis and white russians.

Hey now, there's nothing wrong with white russians. My experience dictates that they're best consumed on a boat, during particularly rough conditions, when you're the only one who isn't horribly seasick, when no one else can stomach the thought of either milk or alcohol, and you wish you gloat about this. And they're also just damn tasty any old time. :twisted:

Azrael wrote:So I guess calling them Tart-tinis is right out?

Disgusting, pejorative, and completely unacceptable. A drink should only end in "-tini" if it contains primarily gin and vermouth, and the only acceptable prefix to that is "[optional adjective] mar-". :)
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby telcontar42 » Tue Sep 29, 2009 4:36 am UTC

ASmileWithoutACat wrote:Also, beer: Do people really consider it that good? I had figured beer-drinking was mostly a macho/socially-expected type thing. The bad stuff tastes like it was produced by an incontinent cat, and I've had better beers, but 'good' beer to me tastes- mostly tolerable. Does it really taste good to people, and is that a purely acquired taste? Sorry, I don't mean to sound dismissive- I think this may be related to my belief that cocktails were invented as a way to drink alcohol while pretending you aren't, because nobody in their right mind would drink something that tastes so foul. Beer tastes too plainly of ethanol for me.


Yes, people absolutely consider beer good. I don't mean to come off as a snob, but if you haven't had much beer, the ones you have had were probably macrobrews. In my opinion, most of these beers taste like shit. Budweiser, coors, heineken, stella artois, even some sam adams (though they have some decent stuff) I prefer not to drink. If you like them that's fine, but if you don't it doesn't mean you don't like beer.

Even among good beer, there is a huge variety. A pilsner, a stout, and an IPA are completely different. Just because you don't like one type does not mean you don't like beer. If you are usually into fruitier drinks, try a fruit lambic. For a dark smokey, chocolaty, coffee flavor try a porter, maybe even a mocha porter. This beer has a real tart vinegary flavor that I love. I can almost guarantee that there exists a beer out there that you would like, so don't give up on all beer.

That said, some beer may really be more of an acquired taste. A lot of good beer has a really intense flavor and if your not used to that it might turn you off. Take an IPA for example. Some American IPAs are really really hoppy. This gives them a amazing complex flavor that's somewhat close to citrus or pine. However, all the hops can also make them very bitter. I often love the bitterness, but I could understand if it was too much for you if you were new to that kind of beer. The thing is, the intense, complex flavor of the beer that might turn some people off is what makes beer so enjoyable to other people. It's like the difference between drinking grape juice and wine, grape juice is sweet and nice and easy to drink, but it's not interesting or complex in the way that a good wine is.

ParanoidAndroid wrote:
the_phoenix612 wrote:What makes a beverage a "chick drink"?

Egg yolks.

Also, I know you joke, but there are some great drinks with egg in them. In particular, I had a fernet flip a while ago that was super tasty.

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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Amarantha » Tue Sep 29, 2009 12:20 pm UTC

SecondTalon wrote:Newcastle Brown Ale
This was my gateway beer. It was like, "Wow, beer doesn't suck. VB sucks."

Belial wrote:Man, I move to rename them from their current sexist appelation to "noob drinks".
Done, and done. And I mean done.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Ulc » Tue Sep 29, 2009 1:02 pm UTC

Belial wrote:Meanwhile, all the guys I know who barely drink, or haven't been drinking long, drink things like appletinis and white russians.


:shock:

You are aware that in a real white russion (I'm not talking about "4cl of vodka, 2 cl of kahlua, half a liter of milk") you can very much taste the alcohol? My favorite way to make them is something along 6cl of vodka, 4 cl of kahlua, 6 cl of 9% cream and shaken with ice, so very nice!*

Anyway..

I try to avoid the term 'chick drinks', as I know a lot of guys that go for the sweeter drinks, and a lot of girls that drinks 6 double Gin & Tonic when they can get away with it. To be fair you kind of need a lot of gin to hide the tonic.

If I had to class 'noob drinks' instead, it's basically anything made with such poor alcohol that you *have* to hide all the flavor, and then around 4 cl. of any given alcohol in half a liter. No matter what you use to hide it, the point of a noob drink is to hide the alcohol.

Seriously, try spending just a little more on your alcohol guys. Just going from that captain morgan rum to Havahna club reserva, which is from around $18 to $25 around here, completely changes your drinks - suddenly they start to taste better if you dont hide all the flavor of the spirit.

ASmileWithoutACat wrote:Also, beer: Do people really consider it that good? I had figured beer-drinking was mostly a macho/socially-expected type thing. The bad stuff tastes like it was produced by an incontinent cat, and I've had better beers, but 'good' beer to me tastes- mostly tolerable. Does it really taste good to people, and is that a purely acquired taste? Sorry, I don't mean to sound dismissive- I think this may be related to my belief that cocktails were invented as a way to drink alcohol while pretending you aren't, because nobody in their right mind would drink something that tastes so foul. Beer tastes too plainly of ethanol for me.


Yes, I consider it that good. And I've been drinking beer for the last 7-8 years, and liked it right from the start.

The important question is, have you had different kind of beers? A IPA is a entirely different thing than english/irish ales, which are again a entirely different thing than belgian weissbeer, not to mention stout, pilsners, Bocks, porters and so on.

As mentioned by telcontar42, some beers are definetely a aquired taste, I dont think anyone can drink a stout as their first beer and enjoy it. But you get introduced through some mild pilsner usually, which does taste good, if a bit bland. Then they start to be kinda boring, and you want something with more intense flavor, and suddenly you're drinking IPA's :D

telcontar42 wrote:That said, some beer may really be more of an acquired taste. A lot of good beer has a really intense flavor and if your not used to that it might turn you off. Take an IPA for example. Some American IPAs are really really hoppy.


Lagunitas IPA! (missing a drooling smiley here)


*For the record, I'm definetely not new to drinking
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A White Russian, shades and a bathrobe, what more can you want from life?

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Axman
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Axman » Wed Sep 30, 2009 10:37 am UTC

True fact: the part of your brain that recognizes (wait, which facts aren't true?) flavors is turned to white matter during puberty then retrained after, so things like beer which have delicious maltacity must be learned to love.

Or relearned, if you had fucked up parents.

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Belial
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Re: Noob Drinks

Postby Belial » Wed Sep 30, 2009 12:01 pm UTC

TheSkyMovesSideways wrote:Hey now, there's nothing wrong with white russians.


Didn't say there was. Just said it's a noob drink. Even a gamer who's been mashing buttons since s/he was knee-high to something suitably hyperbolic enjoys a spot of tetris or bejeweled now and then. Likewise, I consider myself a reasonably experienced drinker (or at least upper intermediate) and that doesn't stop me from occasionally enjoying any number of nauseatingly sweet alco-things. (I mean, fuck, I had a bottle of fucking Barenjager in my liquor cabinet for the longest time. That liqueur serves absolutely no purpose except to make things nauseatingly sweet) They're just not the full extent of my taste.
addams wrote:A drunk neighbor is better than a sober Belial.


They/them

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TheKrikkitWars
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby TheKrikkitWars » Wed Sep 30, 2009 12:39 pm UTC

Izawwlgood wrote:I move to add Modelo and Becks to the list. A list that could perhaps, be used to guide the young initiates towards the wonder that is beer.


I really can't see a world in which Becks (Green bottle, silver label with red circle and blue writing?), is on the same level as a pint of Dog (Newcastle Brown) or any of Burton's finest.

I'd move to add John Smith's Magnet (but not regular Smiths), Black Sheep Ale, Nile Special (Brewed in Jinja) and Guinness Foreign Extra to encompass yet more of the wide range of beers that are easy to appreciate.

The Importance of finding a publican who can keep his ale well is not to be underestimated by the beginning drinker either.
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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Adacore » Wed Sep 30, 2009 1:35 pm UTC

I really don't have a sweet tooth, and even I started off on "noob drinks" thinking that beer tasted bitter and horrible. Then I started drinking Guinness (not necessarily recommending, just giving some history), which was relatively easy to drink and, from there, moved on to other stuff - both lagers and real ales. Now cocktails and other sweet drinks taste nasty and sickly-sweet to me. Beer is, as others have said, massively variable too. My housemates swear by Carling, which I just don't understand at all - it tastes foul to me - I like Dutch lager, most British real ales and German pils. Polish and Czech lager can be pretty interesting too.

When it comes to spirits, as Ulc said the quality makes a lot of difference. I went on holiday to Cuba the year before Uni and brought back a bottle of rum that tasted like liquid gold - it was just in a completely different league to Captain Morgans. Similarly, a good single-malt whiskey is a totally different drink to, say, Bells. With high quality spirits it's pretty much criminal to mix them, whereas with the lower quality stuff you have to in order to mask the bad taste.

Wine can be similar as well - a really good wine tastes amazing. You can find decent tasting wines in the cheap end of the market (you can also find a lot of stuff that tastes like drain cleaner), but stuff like vintage Bordeaux can be mindblowingly good (and expensive).

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Re: Chick Drinks

Postby Ulc » Wed Sep 30, 2009 1:50 pm UTC

Adacore wrote:I really don't have a sweet tooth, and even I started off on "noob drinks" thinking that beer tasted bitter and horrible. Then I started drinking Guinness (not necessarily recommending, just giving some history), which was relatively easy to drink


Guinness is one of the few beers that I still can't really drink - the flavor is nice, but any beer most suitable served with the comment "Do you want a slice of guinness?" is just.. Well, let's just say that I can't get over the thickness.

Belial, just to be sure, you are talking about a properly made White Russian right? Nothings worse than people mixing half a liter of milk and a little bit of vodka, a little bit of kahlua and calling it a white russian! If they are made strong, definitely not what I would call a noob drink.
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it - Aristotle

A White Russian, shades and a bathrobe, what more can you want from life?


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