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Menacing Spike
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Menacing Spike » Tue May 24, 2011 2:01 pm UTC

Oregonaut wrote:
Dason wrote:I was talking with some friends the other day and apparently they didn't know that fire can solve any problem. They tried for a good 20 minutes to come up a situation where fire wasn't a solution. They failed.

Seriously, if fire can't solve the situation you are not using enough fire.


Replace fire with magma and you have dwarf fortress.

(dwarves unhappy? Magma. Noble mandating shit? Magma. Invaders? Magma. Sicknesses? Magma. Useless dwarf with a broken spinal column eating your food? Magma. Elf ambassador whining? Magma. Need something to trade? Obsidian. Bored? Orbital magma canon, etc)

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OBrien
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby OBrien » Tue May 24, 2011 2:15 pm UTC

Image

You called?

... God I'm so bored...
Spelling and grammar can go screw themselves.

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Oregonaut
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 2:19 pm UTC

My neck hurts.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Menacing Spike
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Menacing Spike » Tue May 24, 2011 2:43 pm UTC

Oregonaut wrote:My neck hurts.


Magma.

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Oregonaut
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 2:46 pm UTC

- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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SamaraLexx
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby SamaraLexx » Tue May 24, 2011 4:36 pm UTC

I want my legacy in this office to be that I taught the women that the correct response to, "Can someone change the water cooler?" is not "Just wait till one of the guys comes by."

You have arms, you're healthy. That's all you need. The boys aren't going to lift with their penis...as far as I know.

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Dason
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Dason » Tue May 24, 2011 4:38 pm UTC

SamaraLexx wrote:You have arms, you're healthy. That's all you need. The boys aren't going to lift with their penis...as far as I know.

How can you be sure? Have you watched them every time?
double epsilon = -.0000001;

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby SecondTalon » Tue May 24, 2011 4:39 pm UTC

Lift? With my penis? God no. That'd be... well, horrible. Painful, unsanitary, disgusting... just awful. But bounce it off my penis so the water bottle does a half-flip in the air and plunks down in the cooler to show off my aiming skills? That's just classy right there.
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Menacing Spike
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Menacing Spike » Tue May 24, 2011 4:47 pm UTC

SecondTalon wrote:Lift? With my penis? God no. That'd be... well, horrible. Painful, unsanitary, disgusting... just awful. But bounce it off my penis so the water bottle does a half-flip in the air and plunks down in the cooler to show off my aiming skills? That's just classy right there.


Try propelling it with a mighty and sudden erection?

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Midnight
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Midnight » Tue May 24, 2011 6:09 pm UTC

[quote="OBrien"

EDIT: Zarq: Hey, I wasn't complaining about having four left, I was complaing about people complaining about having only one left. Honest![/quote]
I wasn't complaining about having one left! I said it was sweet! I said zippity-bang-doo-dah!
I'm psyched as fuck!
uhhhh fuck.

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Zarq
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Zarq » Tue May 24, 2011 6:13 pm UTC

Midnight wrote:
OBrien wrote:
EDIT: Zarq: Hey, I wasn't complaining about having four left, I was complaing about people complaining about having only one left. Honest!

I wasn't complaining about having one left! I said it was sweet! I said zippity-bang-doo-dah!
I'm psyched as fuck!


Look at the thread-title.
You rang?

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Oregonaut
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 6:15 pm UTC

I dunno, man. He said "zippity-bang-doo-dah". That's...uh...yeah.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby felltir » Tue May 24, 2011 6:16 pm UTC

My oh my!
Spoiler:
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broken_escalator
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby broken_escalator » Tue May 24, 2011 6:19 pm UTC

SamaraLexx wrote:The boys aren't going to lift with their penis...as far as I know.

The genitalia is only meant to destroy, not build. With sufficiently powerful brass balls a man can use them as wrecking balls. They are most commonly used to destroy relationships and plastic army men. There is no correlation between relationships and plastic army men afaik.

Lifting though? Maybe if you fashioned a pulley system or a crane...

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Oregonaut
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 6:20 pm UTC

Why is it called an erection then?
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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broken_escalator
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby broken_escalator » Tue May 24, 2011 6:25 pm UTC

Irony!

Also the same reason a built building sounds like something that is still in the build process :P

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Menacing Spike
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Menacing Spike » Tue May 24, 2011 6:38 pm UTC

Oregonaut wrote:Why is it called an erection then?


It... erects... a monument of destruction?

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby DaBigCheez » Tue May 24, 2011 6:39 pm UTC

broken_escalator wrote:The genitalia is only meant to destroy, not build.


The gun is good. The penis is evil.
existential_elevator wrote:It's like a jigsaw puzzle of Hitler pissing on Mother Theresa. No individual piece is offensive, but together...

If you think hot women have it easy because everyone wants to have sex at them, you're both wrong and also the reason you're wrong.

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Oregonaut
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 6:48 pm UTC

DaBigCheez wrote:
broken_escalator wrote:The genitalia is only meant to destroy, not build.


The gun is good. The penis is evil.

This is my rifle, this is my gun, this is for fighting, this is to club baby seals to death with.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Midnight
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Midnight » Tue May 24, 2011 6:53 pm UTC

Zarq wrote:
Midnight wrote:
OBrien wrote:
EDIT: Zarq: Hey, I wasn't complaining about having four left, I was complaing about people complaining about having only one left. Honest!

I wasn't complaining about having one left! I said it was sweet! I said zippity-bang-doo-dah!
I'm psyched as fuck!


Look at the thread-title.

yknow I probably put this in the wrong thread.

genuine(ly unrelated) rant: FUCK Y'ALLLLLLLLL. lemme have this one, don't shut me down, etc.
uhhhh fuck.

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OBrien
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby OBrien » Tue May 24, 2011 7:19 pm UTC

Image
Spelling and grammar can go screw themselves.

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Virtual_Aardvark » Tue May 24, 2011 7:25 pm UTC

GOD DAMMIT BEING BAD AT MATH DOESN'T FUCKING MAKE ME STUPID!

I will not conform to your closed minded view of what intelligence is. Dickwad.
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby felltir » Tue May 24, 2011 8:26 pm UTC

The constant alarm is distracting me, giving me a headache. It's distracting me from the telescreen.

I spent the day trying to make people I will not ever meet understand the reason for, and the necessity of double-think.

I wish the streets were safe to walk.

I miss coffee. I miss chocolate.

I cannot let down my guard here.

This is 1984.
Spoiler:
RoadieRich wrote:He's a super flexible furry martial artist from London. She is a Rabbit breeding mad scientist from Michigan. They fight crime!
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Aaeriele » Tue May 24, 2011 8:29 pm UTC

Virtual_Aardvark wrote:GOD DAMMIT BEING BAD AT MATH DOESN'T FUCKING MAKE ME STUPID!

I will not conform to your closed minded view of what intelligence is. Dickwad.


++
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Magnanimous » Tue May 24, 2011 8:38 pm UTC

I saw a guy lift a can of paint with his once.

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Jave D
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Jave D » Wed May 25, 2011 5:49 am UTC

So I went to the Fox News FB page and spent a few hours engaging in discussion with the overwhelmingly right-wing members there.

First observation: as a liberal, I got called an anti-Semite a lot. This despite the fact that I'm a Jew and said nothing bad about Jews at all.

Second observation: two right-wingers who spent hours going on about how the Jews killed Jesus, and how Osama bin Laden targeted the US because of "the Jews," and how I was "just a Jew" and should "go back to Israel" didn't get called anti-Semitic by anybody. I think besides me, maybe 2 or 3 people said anything negative towards them.

Conclusion: Fox News fans are racist, hypocritical morons, and a dismaying number of people in this country would not (literally) lift a finger in defense of Jews.

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Midnight » Wed May 25, 2011 6:29 am UTC

Jave D wrote:Second observation: two right-wingers
Conclusion: Fox News fans

with a sample size of two, I'm sorry, no dice.
Though I hate Fox news as the apotheosis of everything that's wrong with the current state of mass media, but I even know some right-wing Fox-News-watching Jews, and I don't think that, say, Bill O'Reilly dislikes Jews.


...he doesn't seem much of a fan of black people, though.
uhhhh fuck.

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Link » Wed May 25, 2011 6:35 am UTC

The cable television problem I ranted about on page 459? Turns out more people are having problems with the same company, and it just made the regional news. IN YOUR FACE, YOU BUNCH OF DROOLING COCKBADGERS!

They interviewed an employee of the cable company, after first having heard a national broadcaster say that the signal at their end is excellent, and any problems along the line are the responsibility of the regional cable companies. Basically it went like this:
Cable company guy (CCG): The problem lies with the broadcasting companies.
Interviewer: That directly contradicts what we've heard from the broadcasting companies.
CCG: Yes.
(awkward silence)
CCG: Well, we're investigating it.

In any case, the fact that's on the regional news means they can't just deny there's a problem, and hopefully it'll get fixed soon-ish. If they don't fix it soon-ish, a lot of people will still have seen this news report (probably), and I suspect the company will end up getting a metric fuckton of hatemail.

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby fizzgig » Wed May 25, 2011 10:18 am UTC

Midnight wrote:
Jave D wrote:Second observation: two right-wingers
Conclusion: Fox News fans

with a sample size of two, I'm sorry, no dice.
Though I hate Fox news as the apotheosis of everything that's wrong with the current state of mass media, but I even know some right-wing Fox-News-watching Jews, and I don't think that, say, Bill O'Reilly dislikes Jews.


...he doesn't seem much of a fan of black people, though.


It's not a sample size of 2 though. I believe Jave D was calling the Fox News fans racist hypocrites because they called him anti-semitic, but didn't call out the two people who were actually being anti-semitic.

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Yakk » Wed May 25, 2011 12:19 pm UTC

Virtual_Aardvark wrote:GOD DAMMIT BEING BAD AT MATH DOESN'T FUCKING MAKE ME STUPID!

Of course not. Being bad at math is a symptom, not a cause -- they clearly got it backwards. Basic logic. Sheesh!

:p~
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Giant Speck » Wed May 25, 2011 3:16 pm UTC

fizzgig wrote:
Midnight wrote:
Jave D wrote:Second observation: two right-wingers
Conclusion: Fox News fans

with a sample size of two, I'm sorry, no dice.
Though I hate Fox news as the apotheosis of everything that's wrong with the current state of mass media, but I even know some right-wing Fox-News-watching Jews, and I don't think that, say, Bill O'Reilly dislikes Jews.


...he doesn't seem much of a fan of black people, though.


It's not a sample size of 2 though. I believe Jave D was calling the Fox News fans racist hypocrites because they called him anti-semitic, but didn't call out the two people who were actually being anti-semitic.

Regardless, it's still a sweeping generalization.
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Torvaun » Wed May 25, 2011 3:56 pm UTC

That doesn't mean it's wrong. If, generally speaking, Fox News commenters actually are racist, anti-Semitic hypocrites, then why not call a spade a spade?
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby broken_escalator » Wed May 25, 2011 4:05 pm UTC

Because then they start victim playing.

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Oregonaut » Wed May 25, 2011 5:28 pm UTC

Pick up the phone you worthless, flea-infested, harridan.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Dason » Wed May 25, 2011 5:58 pm UTC

Oregonaut wrote:Pick up the phone you worthless, flea-infested, harridan.

I'm too busy trying to get rid of these damns fleas!
double epsilon = -.0000001;

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Ptolom » Wed May 25, 2011 6:48 pm UTC

Today I was locked in a car and had to climb through a window which only rolled down two thirds of the way. Nobody thought to wonder why I was just sitting in the car by myself.

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broken_escalator
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby broken_escalator » Wed May 25, 2011 6:51 pm UTC

How did you get locked inside a car?

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Amie
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Amie » Wed May 25, 2011 7:17 pm UTC

Fuck my sleep patterns.
Summer is miles and miles away, and no one would ask me to stay.
And I, should contemplate this change... to ease the pain.
And I, should step out of the rain... turn away.

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Ptolom
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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby Ptolom » Wed May 25, 2011 7:54 pm UTC

broken_escalator wrote:How did you get locked inside a car?

With one of those remote locking key things. My mother didn't realise I hadn't opened the door when she locked it and went inside.

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Re: Rant Thread (because we need more ranting)

Postby SurgicalSteel » Wed May 25, 2011 8:05 pm UTC

And the doors can't be unlocked from inside? That seems like a safety issue.
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