Corrupt-a-wish

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bug sniper
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Wed Feb 06, 2019 5:34 pm UTC

Granted and he's now looking for the culprit. He declared a state of emergency so that policemen can search homes and detain people who own batman costumes.

I wish for more dessert and less desert.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Thu Feb 07, 2019 4:51 am UTC

Granted. All desserts are replaced with desert. All the desert is replaced by dessert.

I wish to become an evil dictator.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Thu Feb 07, 2019 7:51 pm UTC

granted, your the dictator of yourself, and can be as mean as you want toward yourself.

i wish for 1 bitcoin in my blockchain wallet
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Fri Feb 08, 2019 1:55 am UTC

Granted. You bought it long ago. You misprinted the wallet number, and no longer have access to it.

I wish people discussing politics were rational rather than emotional.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sat Feb 09, 2019 12:54 am UTC

granted, unfortunately rational is a fairly loose term, they may have widely varying view points and try to back them up strongly.

i wish for a companion.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Sat Feb 09, 2019 2:53 am UTC

phillip1882 wrote:granted, unfortunately rational is a fairly loose term, they may have widely varying view points and try to back them up strongly.
Still a win. ("Rational" doesn't mean "agrees with me".)

phillip1882 wrote:i wish for a companion.
Granted. It's a cactus plant.

I wish my headphone jack wasn't broken.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Sat Feb 09, 2019 12:31 pm UTC

Granted. It's completely missing now.

I wish this cold I'm having was already over.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby eran_rathan » Sat Feb 09, 2019 3:26 pm UTC

granted, it turned into pneumonia.

i wish there was a cure for pneumonia.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sat Feb 09, 2019 5:14 pm UTC

granted long enough bed rest and it will go away.

i wish to win the lottery every time i play.
good luck have fun

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eran_rathan
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby eran_rathan » Tue Feb 12, 2019 5:33 pm UTC

Granted, you always win exactly half of what you spent on it.

I wish for universal health care that doesn't suck.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SuperNerd » Tue Feb 12, 2019 9:24 pm UTC

Granted. Oh, you don't work for Universal? No healthcare for you!

I wish people would stop pronouncing "nuclear" as "nucular".

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Tue Feb 12, 2019 9:37 pm UTC

Granted. Everyone pronounces it as "nyoocular" now. (Unless that's already the pronunciation you meant, in which case strike the "y".)

I wish this cough would go away.
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bug sniper
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Wed Feb 13, 2019 3:52 pm UTC

Granted. The surgeon successfully removes a lung.

I still wish for more dessert and less desert.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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svenman
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Wed Feb 13, 2019 6:25 pm UTC

Granted. The former Sahara Desert is now covered with chocolate pudding, which through a complex chain reaction unfortunately will lead to the collapse of the biosphere.

I wish I could go back in time while retaining my knowledge and experience.
Apart from Forum Games, mostly active on the One True Thread.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby thunk » Wed Feb 13, 2019 6:31 pm UTC

Nothing changes.

I wish someone made complicated Alps keyboard switches again.
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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Fri Feb 15, 2019 12:09 am UTC

Granted. Someone does, but by the time you find xim, they are out of business and their stock is gone. You find somebody else, too late but less late this time. The rest of your life is spent tracking down the (next) new makers of this keyboard switch, and you keep getting tantalizingly closer each time, but it always eludes you.

I wish the Opportunity Rover came back to life, and told us, and we were listening.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Sat Feb 23, 2019 8:51 pm UTC

Granted. It's giving us a heads-up that its new masters will very soon proceed to wipe out all life on Earth.

I wish the weekend wouldn't go by so quickly.
Apart from Forum Games, mostly active on the One True Thread.
If you need help understanding what's going on there, the xkcd Time Wiki may be useful.

Addams thanks all of us who helped. Her life is much better now.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sun Feb 24, 2019 11:44 pm UTC

granted weekends are now 1 hour longer.

i wish people cared more for each other.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Mon Feb 25, 2019 3:40 am UTC

Granted. Everyone is either a patient in a nursing home, or a nurse in the nursing home. Every month they swap places.

I wish for a good studio recording of that play I wrote.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Mon Feb 25, 2019 6:42 pm UTC

Granted, but it's a recording of a very lousy production. The actors all mumble. The lighting is by candlelight (actual candlelight, not Hollywood candlelight), and the sets are different each scene, each from an unrelated play.

I wish I could wake up on time easiliy.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Mon Feb 25, 2019 7:02 pm UTC

granted, you get an alarm clock and it wakes you up at the time you set it for.

wish no more corruptions on wishes, except to counter act bad ones.
good luck have fun

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bug sniper
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Tue Feb 26, 2019 8:11 am UTC

Granted, but the universe is engulfed in a metalogical twilight zone in which the words "no more", "except", and "counter act" actually mean "a lot more", "especially", and "bolster". More corruptions happen, and the outcomes only cause even more pain and suffering thanks to your wish.

I wish for dedesertation.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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phillip1882
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sat Mar 02, 2019 2:34 am UTC

granted. desert areas begin developing trees, grass, and plants.

i wish for a formula or algorithm that goes through composite numbers in order without going trough the primes.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby SecondTalon » Thu Mar 07, 2019 1:31 pm UTC

Granted! It only works in Base 1376.

I wish I was a little bit taller.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby plytho » Thu Mar 07, 2019 2:10 pm UTC

Granted, your feet are now covered by a cushion of blisters.

I wish I could draw better.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Thu Mar 07, 2019 3:26 pm UTC

granted, you're an artist now.

no wish this time.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby lllllllllwith10ls » Fri Mar 08, 2019 4:44 pm UTC

A random wish gets granted. You get crused by a decillion pennies.

I wish for yoylecake

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Fri Mar 08, 2019 10:32 pm UTC

granted but if you eat it you turn to metal.

i wish to one day be a pro go player.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Sat Mar 09, 2019 12:00 am UTC

Granted. You are offered five cents to play go on Tuesday. You accept. You play go for five cents. You lose.

When you return to work on Wednesday, you find that Tuesday was "the big meeting" and you missed out. You are fired.

I wish that I hadn't seen the third act before I saw the first act.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sat Mar 09, 2019 9:04 pm UTC

granted, you now remember seeing the acts in order.

i wish for happiness.
good luck have fun

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lllllllllwith10ls
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby lllllllllwith10ls » Sat Mar 09, 2019 10:45 pm UTC

Now you're happy and depressed at the same time, somehow

I wish for
mom fapathi

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phillip1882
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sun Mar 10, 2019 12:20 am UTC

granted you get space.

i wish more items are BOGO.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Sun Mar 10, 2019 2:30 am UTC

Granted. All forms of sale prices and bonuses are eliminated. If you buy one, you get (that) one.

I wish for new Andersen windows.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sun Mar 10, 2019 10:50 pm UTC

granted, installation costs about 300.

i wish to be more helpful.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Sun Mar 10, 2019 10:51 pm UTC

Granted. Install my windows. For free. And do a splendid job.

I wish to have my windows installed.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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lllllllllwith10ls
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby lllllllllwith10ls » Sun Mar 10, 2019 11:24 pm UTC

You get a virus named "windows" on your pc

I wish you a merry christmas
mom fapathi

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phillip1882
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sun Mar 10, 2019 11:34 pm UTC

granted everyone visits family for christmas and has an enjoyable time.

i wish to decorate my house with christmas lights around late november and keep them up until early january.
good luck have fun

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flicky1991
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby flicky1991 » Mon Mar 11, 2019 6:21 am UTC

Granted. There's nothing stopping you doing so, but the neighbours hate you for it.

I wish for the confidence to be my true self.
any pronouns
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Mon Mar 11, 2019 2:50 pm UTC

Granted; this also involves you turning into a bird, and as such you loose your opposable thumbs.

I wish for opposable pinkies.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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eran_rathan
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby eran_rathan » Mon Mar 11, 2019 3:21 pm UTC

granted, you get opposable baby rats.

I wish for a Brain in the White House.
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"Google tells me you are not unique. You are, however, wrong."
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